Tuesday 6 March 2007

Rant 033 / Democracy gives stability created by instability

Chatting on MSN and chatting in real life have their pros and cons. If one prefers to chat on MSN, the person prefers to give others an impression of oneself that the person wants, and cares less for understanding the others. Vice versa for chatting in real life.

To chat on MSN, there is no way to show facial expressions. Therefore there is no way to tell if the person is lying, among many things. Neither can the opposite parties tell all these from the MSN chatbox alone.

But one is able to present an image that the person wants to show, simply by phrasing his words the right way. Since the others must rely on your words alone to sense your emotions, what you say and how you say it are of utmost importance.

In real life, you can say "fuck you" while grinning at something someone else said, and it is interpreted as a friendly response. In MSN, to represent grinning, ":D" is used. So in the box, one may type "fuck u :D" and this is easy to misunderstand. E.g. it can be translated as a serious curse, and the smile is really something to hide anger with.

Of course the person may use "lol" and this would be much harder to misunderstand. However "lol" is not accurate in the fact that this means one's laughing, while a grin is a much milder expression.

However, when "lol" is used often in such a erroneous way (i.e. everytime the person smiles, he uses "lol"to show his smile in the chatbox), he presents a very cheerful image to the other people talking to him. He may not even be amused at all in real life, but uses "lol" whenever he senses the other people are trying to joke or say something funny.

In real life, every facial expression is important. Words take a much less important role in conveying messages. Every twitch of the eye, every glance you give to others, everytime you turn your head to see something else, tells the others something. Lying here is a much harder art to master, compared to doing the same in MSN.

Of course I will not list what can be done to tell if someone is lying, lest someone tries to use it on me LOL! Life would be so boring then. Not that I'm a good liar. In fact I dislike lying. And I can't always tell when the better liars lie. Some people can lie so well, you think they are lying even when they tell the truth. Just pray someone like that don't end up as your boss...

Boss: "Hey this year I'm recommending that you receive a 12 month bonus! Happy?"
You: "Fuck you and your motherfucking lying mouth!"

Interpret as you wish.

Thus in real life, an observant person can tell how the other people really are. Unless one of the others turn out to be an accomplished liar, in which case you should never believe anything they say. Not even when they say they're not lying. Seriously. Unless it won't hurt at all to believe.

Back to the original point. In real life, whatever the average person tries to do, the image one presents will always be, at least, somewhat similar to one's true self. The longer you know that person, the closer you can get to the truth. The second applies to MSN too, though at a much slower rate.

But in MSN, the image the person tries to present may be totally different from what one really is. By phrasing everything that is typed in the desired way, any image is possible. A complete genious can present an image of a vulgar asshole. A grown man can be seen as a teenage boy. A permanently AFK person can seem like an antisocial, introverted prick (LOL). With ease, even a shy and quiet person can become a totally different person in MSN.

Another thing about MSN conversations is that one is able to add more depth to the chat by using online resources to search for information. Since not responding for minutes is a very common thing in MSN, you can do the same and google for stuff you don't know while pretending to be AFK.

This cannot be done in real life, unless you are sitting next to information sources like the library or computers. With the information, one can lengthen the conversation while in real life, such ignorance will result in pauses that may end the whole chat, or make one look shallow.

The best thing about MSN conversations is that the other party do not know what you are really doing. You may be cutting you toenails, eating with you hands and typing with your toes, or even digging your nose. As long as there is no webcam, the others will only imagine you sitting there nicely in your chair and smiling while typing your words. Tell me I'm wrong. Tell me honestly you know when the other person is scratching his ass while typing with his other hand. I dare you.

But in real life, you're honest. You are able to express laughter more effectively. You are able to manipulate your body language to hasten the conversation. You are able to exchange information much faster.

And most importantly, if you're close enough, you can touch the others. Not in the way those with vile minds would imagine, but things like hugs, pats on their shoulders and backs cannot be done effectively in MSN.

And by touching, a person is able to convey more feelings than can ever be said. A hug is infinitely more efficient than saying " I'm so sorry about what happened." A pat and a smile is much better than typing, "You can do it!"

It may seem obvious why anyone would prefer to chat in in MSN than in real life. But there are really many reasons to why chatting in MSN is better, to some people. And many reasons to why some prefers real life to MSN. Reasons that I have not included here.

No comments:

Post a Comment