Rant 1275 / An Eighth To Ten Thousand.

22nd Nov 2022

My home is a mess. I need to transfer my small form factor PC into the newer casing soon and make more space on my floor. Bring the modular drawers up above the wooden drawers too. That floor space should remain clear.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Managed to be more confident in today's presentation, talked more slowly and gently. 

23rd Nov 2022

So far so good with the Herman Miller Aeron, the lock for the backrest tilt is actually useful, though the headrest itself... I'm beginning to agree with the original designers of the chair that when you're busy, the headrest is redundant (hence the Aeron does not inherently come with a headrest).

It might also partly be that I'm used to using the computer without my glasses and somehow I feel more comfortable hunching over to look at the monitor more closely.

Clinical posting was up since Sunday night, going to IMH like everyone else. Strangely, some of my female classmates will be in male wards while I am going to a mixed gender ward, which means the lack of male nurses is not one of the reasons they're there. So why?

26th Nov 2022

Yet I'd rather spend hours reading the manga Blame than to reassemble my PC.

I am boring, there's no way to get around this fact. The other thing is that I don't like to take charge.

These two are the main factors, I believe, that have led to the current state of my singlehood.

There are two matches who are keen to meet up but can't make time in their schedules, and they haven't responded since yesterday evening, which most likely means they're busy, and I am not interesting enough to pull their attention away from whatever they're doing.

It also means my mind is too free to be dwelling on this, yet I'd rather be procrastinating on what needs to be done this weekend.

Didn't even workout just now, except for a little bit on the elliptical, barely enough to work up a sweat.

 

...

 

This feels a little like a wave of depression, except I managed to do something about it. Settling my laundry helped made me feel better, guess household chores are indeed therapeutic. Shall unfold my mahjong table to begin work on my PC tomorrow.

The last suit I got from Suit Supply felt so amazing. Haven't won it in so long that I'd forgotten just how comfortable it was. Had to use the jacket as a blazer because had a presentation that required smart casual, and I had run out of any good pants that could go with my shirts, so wearing jeans with a t-shirt and putting a jacket on top was the only reasonable way to attain smart casual level with my current wardrobe.

Just got a pink long sleeve button-down shirt from Robert Graham this Black Friday, plus a pair of black jeans that looks like a pair of chinos, so hope this works in the future. Bringing my jacket around in school was no fun, not to mention it felt like a massive overkill for the purpose it served that day.

Matched with a Brazilian woman today. She's touring Asia next year, but it's going to be nothing, unless things change next year. Hard to imagine myself being a tour guide for anyone.

Forgot to get something for my part-time helper. Not only has she been preparing labour-intensive garnishes for my simple dishes, I think she fixed my kitchen light.

Not sure if possible to get her anything right for xmas, so might just settle for a red packet for CNY.

The Atlas headrest turned out to be quite redundant indeed. Leaned back and yawned hard just now, and my head managed to push the headrest off the chair. It's just not sturdy enough, and I don't rest my head on it much in the first place, so might not reattach it.

27th Nov 2022

Nah, the light isn't fixed.

Accidentally overbought some items. Now I've got an extra carton of fat-free milk that I usually take for lunch, and an additional hundred capsules of activated charcoal. Fortunately, neither is a major issue, since I'd recently noticed that the fat-free milk only contains under fifty calories per packet, so I can easily take two a day, plus one more in the evenings, and even if weekends are out, that's still fifteen per week, or sixty per month. Two cartons make ninety-six packets, so this would only last a month and a half, or I can stretch it more by only having two packets a day on weekdays only.

The charcoal pills last for years, so it doesn't really matter very much.

03rd Dec 2022

This week was meant to be a breather but turned out to be yet another hectic week involving my first time staying in school for a project meeting till 7pm even though classes had ended by 4pm.

Totally forgotten to not make finding a partner the main goal of my life. Changing it now. Trying the sensory deprivation pool next week.

06th Dec 2022

It's already December 2022, and it's time to plan gifts and potluck. Maybe I'll wrap cherry tomatoes with cucumber instead of wrapping grapes.

10th Dec 2022

Not making food for class potluck because it's going to have to be halal.

Opened up the new casing and my small form factor PC only to realise it's pretty complicated to take apart, not worth the effort to bring the components over. Going to keep the new casing aside, maybe make a new PC when the old one dies.

Went for float therapy on Friday morning, used to be known as sensory deprivation tanks. It's a pod that is filled with water about 20cm deep that's saturated with epsom salt, so you float in it. This pod can be closed and the light inside can be turned off, so you can't see or feel anything. Still can hear though, particularly your breathing. The spa is also in a small light industrial building, so there was once or twice when I could hear some very light rolling noises, since it's not sound-proof, just dampens outside noises very much. The loudest noise was my own breathing, or the crack of my joints at the end.

Good for back sleepers, bad for people like myself who find it hard to fall asleep on my back because I'd feel my throat closing as it relaxes (turns into snores) and wake up. Also, close to the end of the session, probably at around 45-50mins, I felt the need to turn, likely to keep my blood circulation going, but that was not possible. Pretty nice overall if you need to find silence and darkness, but an hour is more than enough.

14th Dec 2022

A bit of a breather week this week. Three matches on CMB, none were right.

https://youtu.be/etnMr8oUSDo

The caffeine analysis was a surprise in that you get less caffeine in an espresso as compared to a pour-over even with the same amount of beans. 

It also confirms that the longer you steep the beans, eg in a French press, the more caffeine you get out of it, so in the Aeropress I'm currently using, if I leave the hot suspension in the upside-down Aeropress to steep for longer, it will get stronger up to a certain point.

And yeah, that's my current technique - flip the Aeropress upside down with the plunger in at half cm from edge, put 16g grinds and 230+g water in, stir and let it steep, put cover on, put mug over cover, flip it back. Stirring is absolutely necessary to release the air bubbles that will be created (typically in the form of crema) when the grinds are disturbed as you flip the Aeropress. Without stirring, the near-instantaneous bubble formation will create a sudden push of the plunger out of the Aeropress, and if you weren't bracing for it, the plunger could come loose and lead to spillage.

My vintage candelebra arrived last week. Really as beautiful as expected, hopefully it's really an antique, but will probably never know.

Now the candles from the 12/12 sale on the way.

Overbought a little this 12/12. Got an oval plate I thought was really nice, but not sure how to use it now, and a little too expensive to be given away. Could still be used during gatherings, but tbh I should be getting small bowls rather than platters and plates..

14th Dec 2022

Turns out candles have a catch. I wonder what it is. Will test it out during a weekend, with three candles in the living room and the aircon on.

16th Dec 2022

Time to get a little serious about money, the stream might be drying up by June.

17th Dec 2022

This week turned out to be the breather. Kind of. I still couldn't study much for the pharmacology test.

Haven't been working out much, can see I have gained weight, since the L size shirts are no longer just a little snug while my waistline at the beginning of the semester hovered between L and XL, and it was good that I went ahead and bought more XL jeans during the 11/11 sale, although it isn't exactly necessary yet, since my legs (and presumably also my butt) are shrinking from loss of muscle mass. They're just more comfortable around my waist.

How do people sleep if they work out as much as it is necessary to be physically fit? Last semester my cold sores returned because of my persistence in working out daily just to maintain, and this semester I am getting fat.

Working out isn't as simply as doing the exercises. We need time to change, shower, prepare the equipment on both ends of the sessions, and then it cannot be too soon before bedtime and after meals, but if you work out hungry before meal you'll not perform well.

So right after I get up? Sure, so I get up earlier than I did last semester. But it is near impossible to control what time I sleep without the necessary discipline and time management skill, so the result is less sleep.

Shall I work on those two? Discipline can't be that hard if I can maintain my daily workout schedule like that. Time management has always been my weak point though, and that might need to be honed for my future job.

How?

Writing and pasting the reasons for my working out will help with maintaining the daily workout routine. Will doing the same help for the two?

18th Dec 2022

Realised some whiskeys can go well with raw oysters.

After listening to how the relationship of one of my close friends went over the years, I realised I might have been expecting too much upfront with some of my past relationships, except for the first one. Should cut the next one some slack in the future, focus more on her better side.

22nd Dec 2022

Passed my practical test on wound dressing and aseptic technique yesterday, albeit barely apparently. This is the new course leader who took over our last one who resigned abruptly over the first month of our second semester, and she was much more straightforward, to the point where she asked me if I was really serious about being a nurse because she thought I could do much better than that.

The previous night while going through the list of steps to take for the procedure, I did come to the conclusion that I had been looking at it wrong. Rather than really understanding the principles of asepsis, I took it in as a script, probably because of how the procedure was presented by the module leader as a series of steps to follow, so rather than learning to change wound dressings and handling the sterile field, it was more akin to memorising a script for a play.

23rd Dec 2022

The way we are located at the Straits of Malacca, an absolutely vital route that's almost an artery of fuel and trade for countries like China and Japan, is actually pretty scary while presenting an incredible array of opportunities. It's basically the same as living on the fertile land around some volcanoes.

But rather than a volcanic eruption, we risk proxy wars.

I didn't realise how few options there are beyond our area for the moving of fuel for our East Asian neighbours.

Recently matched with someone who's probably a 9/10 in the photos, turned out to be probably not a scammer so far. I say probably because even though her style seems too roundabout for efficiency if it's a scam, she is too hot and replies too quickly to be real. Beautiful women who speak first and reply promptly are unicorns as far as I know, so until we meet face to face, she's likely a scammer regardless of how she talks. But I use "she" because so far, I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt for her conversation style.

Of course I asked her out by the second day, ie today, just to make sure, but she rejected politely with an explanation, so it feels even likelier to be a scammer, pushing my estimate from 60% to 70% possibility that this is a scammer. Too hot though, I can't help entertaining the conversation. There is this concern that I am thinkinng with my wrong head for sure, but as long as there isn't a mention of money or investment, it remains fine.

26th Dec 2022

Ok that was a scammer. He stopped talking when I mentioned I talk to scammers for fun when I am bored, probably took it as a hint that I'm just messing with him (unlikely to actually be a woman).

What a nice windy day.

Five convos on CMB, stopping one because she wasn't going to meet till Feb. Makes no sense because the text convo can't go on for two months, she's just not that interesting, nor am I.

Back is starting to feel weird again. I absolutely must restart my workout today.

Rant 1274 / One Door Closes, Another Opens. Or Four.

 31st Oct 2022

Now that my brother no longer wants Netflix, I'm taking the opportunity to try the other streaming sites, starting with Amazon since it's so much cheaper.

It's ok, selection seems a lot smaller. Let's see how this goes.

1st Nov 2022

It is November already. Time flies. All my relationships fly. Restarted the swiping yesterday, both CMB and Bumble. Three likes on CMB just within half a day, two on Bumble. Didn't like the likes on Bumble but the ones on CMB aren't revealed till noon later. It's going to be like Christmas.

Practical test tomorrow, with me being the first to be tested, for once. I was starting to dislike the anxiety of waiting so long all the time.

But memorising the short list of common drugs for it is still a pain. Trade names, generic names, drug classes, indications, common side effects, nursing implications for fourteen drugs.

 

I guess as nurses we really do everything but with a focus on care. 

 

Only one among the three likes that I could kinda consider, but feels unlikely. Another two liked popped up on CMB after that but somehow they were revealed instead of being hidden till noon tomorrow, and among these two, one could be considered, so two matches today. 

04th Nov 2022

The one from CMB seems very nice, and she did not upload her best photos onto the app, as I'd discovered when she invited me to move on to TG. In any case, we won't meet for these two weekends since she's flying to the US tomorrow and I will be in Bali by tonight.

07th Nov 2022

Learnt about how easy it is to hit the highest frequent flyer level in Flying Blue, and it really is.

It costs under S$176 for a return journey in Dec 2022 from Paris to Barcelona on Transavia on the lowest fare that earns miles (Plus), and that makes 10XP per trip.

It costs 100XP to go from the basic Explorer to Silver, another 180XP to go from Silver to Gold, then 300XP more to go from Gold to Platinum. Hold Platinum for 10 years and it becomes permanent.

Since prices fluctate, let's take it as S$200 per return trip. To start from zero and hit Platinum requires 580XP. Each Paris-Barcelona trip (about 1.5hrs long each way) gives you 10XP, so that makes 58 trips, costing... S$11600. Do it for 10 years for lifetime Platinum.

Platinum benefits include free 1pc checked luggage, free access with a guest to their lounges, free upgrade to front row seats, extra legroom seats, Economy Comfort (aka premium economy) seats, and seat selection.

Since I'm from Singapore, I can stay home when I'm here instead of having to book a room, and not have to fly to Europe at all, which cuts the total cost of such an endeavour a lot. In other words, I should keep doing what I've just done over the last weekend - fly to Bali.

A trip to Bali costs about S$300 each time, so 58 of such trips will be S$17400.

The qualification of each tier begins the day you earn the first XP, ie it resets each time you move up a tier, so this means you have three years to hit Platinum initially, plus your excess miles roll over, so eg if you somehow earn 10XP when you already have 98XP, 8XP rolls over to the next tier.

Following that, you will have to keep earning 300XP a year to maintain Platinum, or thirty trips to Bali annually for me. Is it really that ridiculous in reality?

In any case, the weekend trip to Bali has refreshed my miles for another two years! Yay!

08th Nov 2022

But if I fly to London via Paris on Air France, the flight from Singapore to Paris nets 12XP while the little flight from Paris to London gives another 5XP, so the return trip totals 34XP, almost seven times the XP from a Bali trip.

Promo return fares right now (that still give XP and miles) are going at S$971 total, or about S$990 after credit card fee, which is still three times the price of the Bali return fares. Three of this will give me Silver status, as compared to ten Bali trips; SEVENTEEN of these will bring me to Platinum.

 

If I can find seventeen of this under-S$1000 fares, it will bring the cost of hitting Platinum to below S$17,000, or if they're all specifically S$990, it will be S$16,830, slightly cheaper than sticking to Bali. 

 

Beyond that, it will take nine trips to London to maintain the status each year.

But what if I look further?

Buenos Aires with two transfers gives 29XP per flight, or 58XP per return fare - only two will be needed to hit Silver, exactly ten to hit Platinum. The catch is that the lowest fare in the short term is S$3430 - ten makes S$34,300. Nope.

New York? Mostly one transfer at CDG (Paris), costs under S$2000, and gives 22XP per flight, or 44XP per return fare, so fourteen of these to reach Platinum, or S$28,000 - still nope.

Ok so using the Singapore-Heathrow fare as benchmark, every XP has to cost only S$29.12 or less.

Anyways this is pretty ridiculous for my new lifestyle. S$17,000 over the max three years is still almost S$5.7k annually, followed by S$9k maintenance per year, for... what? Free upgrades to premium economy on KLM, Air France and Delta, free access to their lounges, and elite status on Skyteam (priority everything on all their airlines).

Since I don't fly much anymore, this makes absolutely no sense. I won't be able to take advantage of these perks enough for them to be worth S$9k a year.

Oh well, it was fun to look into.

The one from CMB probably is not going to be any success, but surprisingly, one of the matches in Bali on Bumble said she will be coming over in Dec, and that's great because it's quite unlikely I'll be getting anyone beyond the second date by then, so regardless of who I'm seeing for the first few dates, it's still acceptable to go on a date with someone else.

And the fact that an Indonesian Chinese woman is able to fly here with miles practically means she isn't a gold-digger going for some rich Singaporean guy.

Let's see how that goes. Probably won't be a long term thing, but these days, all bets are off with my matches anyway.

So topping up my CPF's Ordinary Account doesn't get me tax relief, which kinda sucks. But oh well, I'll just top up my Special Account a little.

12th Nov 2022

Lots to buy yesterday, like glucosamine, fish oil, saline nasal sprays, and a new chair to replace the one that I'm sitting on that doesn't feel safe anymore, not to mention its backrest is tilted further than it should be by default while its max tilt is also tilted more towards the right. Yeah, it's ready to collapse at at time, lets not wait till I get injured to get a new chair when the annual sale is here.

Also emailed the mattress company but no reply for two weeks already, so probably not producing it anymore. Should get a new topper then, probably. A hard foam one.

Probably one of the quietest weeks in a long while. No ongoing convos, no matches. Not too keen on keeping up the convo with the Indonesian lady.

Feels pretty horrible tbh. At least the weather is nice, cool enough to have some alcohol. Haven't touched the pear brandy in a while. Not going crazy with it of course.

Maybe it is the combo of the breakup and the massive difference in Bali, but it's driven me to reconsider dating agencies and singles events again. Been a while too, joining these. Not yet though, a friend did recommend someone to me, going to give her a try first. She'd always seemed nice, but didn't seem to click when we first met.

13th Nov 2022

Got two matches this morning, perked me up a bit. One seems ok, the other one might need help psychologically, could be depression following extended period of time being bedbound after a spinal cord injury. 

Splurged a bit on wine again, but realised all my good wines can't be touched till at least 2024, and that's only for a German riesling. All my wines are now good though, unlike my previous purchases, since they're all gauged by price to WA (aka RP) score, so they're all S$105-165 and WA 94-97, which is a big deal since it's kind of uncommon to find wines WA95 and above being under S$300, let alone around S$150. The wine seller is reputable so it's ok, although the real tests will be in the years to come.

18th Nov 2022

While rearranging my wines, spotted ice on the top and back of my wine fridge, plus several spots on mould on the top wooden rack. That mould is horrible news so immediately wiped it with rubbing alcohol, which only removed the surface mould, hence it called for bleach. Strangely even half an hour of bleaching couldn't get rid of the last bit of mould, so I gave up and dried it, while planning to cover it with some baking soda before use.

Luckily there is no sign of mould anywhere else, so that's a major relief.

My Aeron arrived last night, almost an hour past the delivery time slot stated by the seller.

After adjusting it, only downside is the wheels, feels a little like they're scraping my wooden laminate floor. Probably will swap with the wheels from my last chair that were bought only several months ago. But they're a little too smooth, so idk, probably will take a good look at my floor later to check for evidence of scratches.

Overall, it is as perfect as advertised, though its durability will have to proven through the test of time.

No idea which wine to bring tomorrow. Maybe just the Chateau Mayne-Vieil. Or the Chateau Talbot? Nah, not the Talbot, it's only ready in 2025. Maybe the Aruma, because the first bottle of Mayne-Vieil wasn't very good.

Running out of flat horizontal space in the wine fridge though. Really have to stop buying collectible wines for the next few years.

And got to get some baking soda in there somehow.

21st Nov 2022

First group presentation tomorrow. Pretty straightforward, getting the hang of it, hopefully.

Many likes on CMB over the weekend due to my activation of Boost on the weekend before this. No idea why it took a week to work. Anyway, one was a straight up scammer and another felt like a scammer, so this marks the first time I'm encountering scammers on CMB. Regardless, two good matches and another like still hidden until afternoon later, in addition to the one arranging a date with me.

Still not much hope for the mutual friend being pushed to me, it's challenging to keep the conversation up, might drop it soon if issue persists.

The simple foam topper from the old brand Seahorse has improved the comfort of my bed dramatically. This might really be the permanent solution - just keep getting toppers over a really hard spring mattress. Definitely cheaper than spending S$3000 on a single mattress that is meant to last a decade, given my mattress was S$300 and subsequent toppers cost S$50-100 each - I could easily get twenty-seven toppers with the same budget, which would last the same number of years or more.

Rant 1273 / Conclusions And Interpretations

27th Oct 2022

Tried to arrange for a call, but she seemed really busy and I couldn't stay up beyond 12am on Monday since I've to get up for school at 6am.

Tried to arrange for a call on Tuesday and even asked to meet, but she wanted to keep the timing of the call flexible, and she was staying at her sister's for the week, not to mention she was really busy again, getting home only at midnight. She did show me a photo of her Zoom meeting so that seemed really sincere, but I can't tell if she was really really busy or she was being very nice in the sense that she was trying to pad my fall somehow. On the bright side, after considering the possibility of the latter, I texted her an apology instead, and she suggested meeting last night.

This weekend then.

After working out for three out of the four days last weekend using only the leg day schedule of my long strength-training workout format, it seems like my lower body strength is pretty good now. To be honest, by typical gym standards, I am weak - I was squatting with 26kg only.

But I could run up four stories in my army boots with my full laptop bag while skipping steps all the way, reaching my destination only breathing hard mildly and comfortably in my mask without needing to breathe in through my mouth.

IIRC the best I had done last semester was three floors, and I breathed harder and sweated more at the end.

29th Oct 2022

Agreed to meet on Sunday.

Starting to lag this week, and it's only the third week. Can tell the rest of the class has slowed down since the second week too, which means they didn't pace themselves as I'd thought.

But I think I'm lagging only because of the issue with her and the lack of sleep from it.

Working out twice or thrice a week is still worrisome despite the workouts being longer, probably because they're much less intense while designed solely for building strength rather than for training cardio stamina.

I may gain weight by the fifteenth week, and hopefully lose more during the coming clinical.

Tried Jollybee last night, after all these years, and it turned out to be pretty good value for money, aside from the drinks, and more salty than other big fast food chains. In fact it feels like they used less fats and more salt, which probably is the cheaper option.

So there's no fee to pay to extend my miles at Flying Blue, might have to spend S$400 to fly to Bali just to do that. Plus another S$200-300 on food and accomodation over a weekend, so makes it a S$700 weekend trip. Not cheap at all.

Having a dinner with friends tonight. Not sure what to say about my relationship right now since we're only meeting tomorrow, tentatively.

Currently intend to just be honest about it, that I don't know how it's going.

Yeah I even dreamt of her last night, that's how seriously I'm taking it this time for some reason. First time this has ever happened.

30th Oct 2022

So we were supposed to make plans today to meet and talk but she apologised and said she's still busy outside at almost noon. At this point I can't tell if she's messing with me or really is that incredibly busy despite the fact that Deepavali was a week ago and her cousins had flown back last night.

She sounded sincere but the fact remains that she's been delaying this for a week now. If it is right to gauge a person by his/her words, then this is fine, she's just too busy to meet and talk. If I am to gauge a person by his/her actions, then she's not very keen on talking but also wants to let me down gently by waiting for me to give up. Or she isn't sure if she should let go of me.

I may not even be overthinking it - these days, she doesn't respond immediately to my texts even on weekends as compared to her quick relatively quick replies in the first month, and often she'd go online but doesn't read my texts until much later, even on weekends, like today, when I texted her at about 9.30am only for her to respond at about 11.30am. It's now 6pm.

What's going on?

Yeah it's hard to focus on school now, even though it's Sunday, the day I usually spend preparing for the week ahead.

Yet I can't press her because if she's really as occupied as she sounds, then I'd be adding pressure on her for something she's already promised to do, akin to nagging.

Might have to fly to Bali for a weekend to keep my miles at Flying Blue from expiring. A bit of a waste of money but it's the cheapest option.

Came across some videos that have led to a better understanding of our capsule coffees work.

Nespresso's coffee capsules tend to be rather dark in terms of roast level, no matter how light they say they can be, as compared to actual coffee. This is done for a reason.

The other fact: these capsules can make coffees with much less beans (in weight) than what baristas use, ml for ml. What kind of magic is this? Can you extract more coffee somehow with the capsule machine? Why don't baristas do it already, since this would save them SO MUCH money? Isn't over-extraction a thing in coffee, hence the importance of a consistent grind?

Reason is that the capsules hide the lack of substance with a heavier flavour that dark roasts provide. There isn't actually more coffee, they just dilute what would have been much more bitter brew into something more drinkable. This is why the coffees generally have less character than coffees you grind and brew yourself, unless all you want is the nutty chocolate-like profile that dark roasts have. This is why you cannot taste fruity or grassy notes from capsule coffees. And this is why that red Napoli capsule, the darkest of the Nespresso selections, is the most bitter stuff you can ever find which contains absolutely no profile but bitterness, roasted to just a mere second away from becoming charcoal.

And it's not crema on top of capsule coffees, it's really as you probably suspect from the start - it's foam. You can literally put coffee into a blender and create the same effect on an even greater magnitude.

So this is the truth behind capsule coffee.

31st Oct 2022

She dragged and dragged, but finally, after asking her to give a concrete answer before bed last night, she's finally made things clear at 3am - she wasn't fooling around but also was not ready for a full-blown rs. My interpretation is that she doesn't want a full-blown rs with me. On second thought, it could also be because she has unresolved issues that prevents her from committing into one.

Regardless, I will miss some aspects of our rs this time. On top of being a very sweet woman, she'd shown me what real sex was like, eg what it is like to have sex with a woman who actually knows how to handle a dick. This perhaps played a part in this end too, that I cannot provide the level of sex that she might be used to.

I guess a lot of what I like about her was the sex. Her being the first slim woman with a good figure in my love life, able to bring sex to a level I hadn't experienced before. Perhaps it was a lot less healthy than my past rs, given that it is hard to list positive things about our newly ended rs that have no relation to sex.

Her intelligence was great, but she was hesitant to voice her thoughts, so the latter kinda killed the former. Her career was the best among the women I've dated, but over the months it was clear it really plays only a tiny part given that I don't do big trips these days, there is nothing big to pay for.

In any case, it's over, and I am glad to finally understand why a woman like her can still be single at our age. Now, time to take another break for maybe a month or two. Actually, idk, feel like swiping again. It is a fact that it felt sad to read her reply, but now that I've processed it by typing it here, not much feelings are left.

Rant 1272 / If Only My Education Is The Only Thing In My Life That Would Go Fast, Not Everything Else.

08th Aug 2022

Sometimes it feels like the trend to turn to sustainable energy is because there is a group of wealthy people who are trying to overthrow the old money of the fossil fuel industry. Or maybe it's to weaken their political influence. Seriously, the percentage of people who feel that the environmental issues are the top priorities can't be that high since there are much more urgent challenges we are all facing now everywhere in the developed world, yet here we are spending entire fortunes in tax money to greenwash everything.

Whether that's a good or bad thing, I wouldn't know, but it appears to me like there's a revolution in more ways than one.

09th Aug 2022

The issue might have been the latex mattress topper. Tried sleeping on the mattress directly last night because there wasn't space to fit another queen-sized item on the floor, and I didn't feel like flipping the mattress on its side on the floor while the topper rests directly on the bed frame, and as a result, didn't feel the sag.

Hmm...

12th Aug 2022

Working even as a student nurse is tiring, and this is despite the fact that we can't do most of the things regular nurses do, and anything we can do we have to do under supervision.

I'm tired enough that I am hesitating to continue a conversation with one of the three matches on Bumble because the next sentence is going to be to ask her out... and I feel like staying home all weekend. Worse still is how she's not overweight and she seems nice, only catch being she's Christian.

In my previous life, we'd definitely be setting a coffee or dinner date for this weekend or the next by now, but... I'm replying to everyone else but her.

What a change.

One of the staff nurses in charge of the cubicles next to mine on some shifts had the absolutely most adorable sneeze I've ever encountered. Too bad she's too young for me and a Malay. I couldn't resist a chuckle yesterday when she sneezed twice consecutively, it was so incredibly cute.

02nd Sep 2022

The final day of my fourth week of my first placement as a student nurse. The work itself isn't too bad since it is quite routine mostly, so while it is still challenging for me right now, it should not be once most tasks become muscle memory, like documenting I/O of each patient, changing patients' diapers, and helping them to the washroom.

But I was wrong about having time to work out before the morning shifts because even though I get up at 4am, the first hour is spent washing up and having my coffee. Just too sleepy to do anything strenuous, so from 5am I try to squeeze in one of the short calisthenic workouts with just 4-6 sets per session that also uses 135s breaks, then be ready to get out by 6am for my 7am shift. Better than nothing.

Or maybe they're actually effective, because I've lost 1kg of fats and 1kg of muscle mass (and about 300g of bone density) over the course of the last three weeks of working as a nurse, yet I feel little difference in functional strength. In fact according to my records, there has been no dip in my performance; on the contrary it is still improving in a few aspects, like pushups. Could be a psychological thing though, like I can do more reps only because I believe I can keep going.

Got a date with an Indian lady this weekend. Yet another first. Wonder how that's going to go. 

Some of the patients have been very nice in an awkward way, by trying to buy us coffee or a meal while unable to get out of the ward (they're not allowed to till they're discharged or transferred), which they do by, for example, handing us a packet of instant coffee mix. The fact is that some of the staff nurses are much nicer people than I am, but they're just too busy with regular nursing tasks like documentation and medication rounds, so the patients don't really feel anything from them. I, as a student nurse, seem to give a damn about them more only because I can do very little of actual nursing work, eg nothing dealing with medication and sharp objects, so I seem to be around to help them with the little things much more often, which they interpret as being a very good human being and nurse.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

04th Sep 2022

 

Pants split on Friday halfway through my shift while I bent over with legs apart to shift a patient higher up his bed. Fortunately it was rather close to the groin so it wasn't very visible, and I could walk slowly to ask the staff and my instructor for a sewing kit, though ultimately they handed me two large safety pins and a large stapler that saved my pants temporary. Also used a roll of micropore to reduce friction between the staples and my skin.

 

Was certainly interesting, but not the kind of event I had been hoping for. I want variety, not routine, particularly when I am still a student.

The date went quite well, got a second date. As expected, communication was a little challenging when we spoke too quickly due to our accents. She's travelled some, so it wasn't new to her either. In any case, this isn't a big issue as proven by my time with the Taiwanese who'd preferred to speak Mandarin that I'm rather poor at.

She also seemed quite eager for our dates which I find strange, so I will have to try to figure out why soon.

To be clear, it's strange only because in several ways, she's out of my league. This is really my first time dating someone as slim as her, not to mention she's much better educated and in a more lucrative line given she's renting a one-bedroom apartment just for herself in this time when property prices are known to be ridiculous. And she's far prettier in real life than in her photos, likely due to the lighting and her skin tone.

So why does she appear to be so happy to go out with me? 

Time-wise, it is more sensible to do cardio on weekdays because it is the second fastest of my workouts at half an hour. Since my afternoon shifts require me to be done by 10.30am, perhaps this should be moved to such days, and leave the long strength training to my weekends when there is more time. The shortest workouts, the 4-6 sets of calisthenic exercises lasting up to 30mins, will still be reserved for just before morning shifts.

This gives 2-3 days for cardio, 2-3 days for maintenance workouts aka calisthenics, and 2 days for strength. Sounds fine to me.

07th Sep 2022

Cold sores are back. Fuck.

15th Sep 2022

CI asked me to get a memo from my GP on Monday, so I went to the clinic before my afternoon shift... only to be told it wasn't healed enough for me to return to work, so she extended my MC dramatically - for the rest of the week. So here I am playing Mass Effect.

Was looking at the ship "Normandy", thinking about how it is cool to name a ship after a famous region of a country, so if Singapore ever gets its own spaceships, will they name one of them... the "Yio Chu Kang"?

Anyway listened to my GP and avoided exercise until it healed, but getting back to the routine proved more challenging than usual, probably because I used to be driven by preceding progress, but this clinical has had me dropping two whole kilos in the first three weeks - one kilo fats and one kilo muscle mass. The fats part was awesome, but losing two to three months' worth of hard work in building muscle mass this quickly was a real heartache.

This shows I have to eat more than what I had been eating, so the amount has increased, during the fourth and fifth weeks.

16th Sep 2022

So the reason I've got two coffee capsule machines is because my brother replaced his Nespresso machine with an incredible lever espresso machine that cost about S$3k.

Around two weeks ago I went on a date with this Indian lady I'm still seeing tomorrow, and the Italian restaurant served a pretty good espresso for the dessert. This reminded me of why I upgraded from my coffee press and moka pot to capsule machines - the goal was to get better and more consistent coffees, including espressos.

The capsule machines could never do it, not once, not anywhere, not even with their multitude of espresso capsules, not even with ristretto capsules.

This reminded me of what a good espresso tastes, and thus renewed my search for it. Now that I am more financially free as compared to the last years of my running the business during the pandemic, I can consider the better options - the total will hit what my brother spent of S$3k. However, unlike his setup, this will include S$1k on the automatic grinder and S$2k on the espresso machine. After doing some research (not that much tbh), my conclusion is that the set up will consist of the Niche Zero and the Rancilio Silvia Pro. 

The Niche Zero must come first because all good coffees depend primarily not on the coffee machine but the grinder, and this grinder seems to be unbeatable in terms of being a single-dose grinder for the home, being easy to use and maintain.

The Rancilio Silvia Pro is great for relatively new people because according to award-winning barista James Hoffmann, it serves great espresso right out of the box, requiring few changes and tinkling. This might discourage experienced users who prefer to customise their stuff, but that would make a great entry point for someone like myself who's unfamiliar with such coffee machines and just want a good espresso.

My student days have made me spend a lot less on everything, so for example, last month during my clinical, I'd been so busy my expenditure had gone down to slightly over S$1k, freeing up quite a bit of cash, making this affordable.

Anyways, the final battle in ME1 with the fully indoctrinated Saren crashed my PC thrice before I turned my fan towards it at full blast. That actually work...

Likely conclusion is that even with all the fans, the circulation isn't enough. But then again I had also restarted the game before that fourth try, so it could be that too. We will never know because I am not playing that part again.

Was on Normal difficulty so the entire game felt so easy, I was going around with a pistol and barely had to use my abilities, therefore it felt appropriate to turn it up in ME2... to Insanity. Holy cow even the first few enemies almost killed me, but I've since adapted, so the first boss, the huge Mech where we first meet Tali again, was quite ok.

I think Insanity is going to be fine, there aren't any particularly challenging bosses in this game that stand out in my memory, quite unlike the Krogan battlemaster at the Prothean ruin where we first encounter Liara in ME1.

30th Sep 2022

Ok, definitely crashing my PC because of the heat, because it crashed again in ME2 when the Collector General first assumed direct control over a drone in a fight with us, and then it didn't crash when I aimed my fan towards my desktop the second time I ran it.

Looks like installing all the fans around it still isn't enough.

Finally finished my clinical earlier this week. Never a boring day, because there was a covid positive patient the day before my last day, after my morning shift, who was then transferred before I returned for my final day's morning shift. This meant all remaining patients were close contacts and we had to don N95 masks, and whoever worked with the patients in the cubicle had to don full PPE.

And then there was an elderly patient with hyperactive delirium admitted on the second last day, very confused and had to be restrained. But he was clear-minded enough by lunch on the following day, which was great because he seemed like a really gentle friendly man.

Also had a patient for the past two weeks with sexual disinhibition secondary to his dementia, but because he had to be tended to by male nurses it was challenging to find another ward to transfer him to, and this was made even more challenging when his cubicle had that covid case. By my last day, he had had two victims among us nurses, and it warranted regular patrols by security guards.

He's medically a pervert, I guess. But because it was due to his dementia... can we really blame him? It might have been right to restrain him, but there is really no ill feeling towards him, as far as I'm concerned.

16th Oct 2022

So went for a trip to JB the weekend clinical was over, to stay at a new hotel Opero that turned out to be quite a bargain for the price, even had fresh thosai for breakfast. Too bad it was clear their maintenance had some serious room for improvement, and it won't be long before Opero will become another rundown hotel in Malaysia that looks nice only on the outside.

Food was great though, nice to drive around Johor for food. Haven't had fish lips before, so these shark lips cooked in black bean sauce were amazing. Shark lips are like jelly, it was like eating collagen on bones, and the bones themselves were really cartilage so the restaurant owner told us we could save them and slow-cook the bones to make a really good broth.

The following weekend was a 3-night cruise to Penang on the Genting Dream. Turned out the upgrades weren't discounted, but we did it anyway because the original balcony staterooms were free anyway, we were only port taxes and gratuities totalling S$50/pax/night without the upgrades.

So the result was that three of my friends took a Palace Deluxe Suite while another friend took a Palace Deluxe Premium Suite with me, this arrangement resulted in us paying about S$250/pax/night for the cruise.

And I now know the cruises use days instead of nights for their calculations, but I am more comfortable going with how hotels do it.

The cruise itself was pretty nice, great value for money, particularly with the company I had. Our days went like this: wake up in time for lunch, followed by high tea in the lounge next to the restaurant at 3.30pm, then move on to the snack menu in the same lounge where they had some pretty great food like laksa and chicken wings. At about 5.30pm, it's happy hour at the bar, so we head there for some alcohol, nuts, and a nicer environment for chitchat. Dinner typically has two time slots: 5.30pm and 7.30pm, so if it is the former, we skip happy hour, otherwise we stay till about 7.15pm and head to the restaurant that's already been booked by our butler since the embarkation day. After dinner, it's mahjong till we finish all four winds, and it's bedtime. On the one day our dinner was 5.30pm, we headed to the casino after the meal instead, where I registered for the membership, spent S$200 at baccarat and left with S$230 (learnt to settle for small wins years ago). 15% ROI was a pretty good number anyway.

What really stood out for me was the bed - it was soft and wraps you up into a cocoon, yet doesn't hurt your back. The age of the label of the mattress made it even more impressive, because it was still good after all those years of use. So now rather than the espresso setup, I plan to get a similar bed in the future. The mattress itself will probably be about S$3k-5k, the bed frame will likely have to be custom-made for the 2m by 2m mattress and will cost about S$1.5k-2k, so effectively needing a S$7k buffer.

19th Oct 2022

She seems serious. We seem serious. She's really good at looking confident without actually being more confident than some of the other ladies I've dated. Explains her job.

21st Oct 2022

Why freeze-dried fruits/vegetables are not as popular as I expected - they stick to the molars.

24th Oct 2022

Should I look into oncology nursing?

25th Oct 2022

And another bites the dust. She'd been retiscient with her replies recently, and today I find that she's revamped her Bumble profile (I use our past convo as reference, and looked at her profile also because I suspected she was no longer interested).

On the surface she was great, out of my league, but inside she had a certain darkness she occasionally let seep out. I was actually planning to ask about it next date, because to be fair, we all have wounds that may or may not have healed. Was also trying to find out more, so looked around for her social media but turned out to have none, which made understanding her much more difficult, and could also point to the possibility that she had been badly hurt and still hasn't recovered. She did give me a vague impression that she had difficulty in forming a deeper relationship.

And if she has never had a social media account beyond the texting stuff, as unlikely as it may be for ladies in my age group, there are not too many possible reasons for it. It is not like the issues that army brats face are secrets.

 

Loneliness might have played a part in pushing her to me, let's be clear about that. A woman living alone in a foreign country two years after her mother passes away, even if her sister is in the country, there has to be a huge amount of loneliness there.

Did her issues also have anything to do with the fact that despite her sister being here all these years, she never got out of her country till now? Also despite the fact that she clearly has a disdain for her own country. And she spotted negative behaviours very well, and could be rather sarcastic about it.

I might have dodged a bullet here. What a sad day though, because for once I was finally considering working on it rather than move on, just because she was great on so many levels and that no one was perfect. But now that she's gone this far, staying together would probably leading to cheating, either her or myself. I must admit that there wasn't very much chemistry between us, even though there also haven't been many dates so far. Four only, in almost two months since we matched.

On the bright side, I have finally conceded to myself that my ability to force my will upon others needs work. It is true that I like to throw the responsibility of decisions to them, and this is a common turn-off for at least two of them, and as a nurse, I must be able to make decisions and get others to follow them. Back when I ran the business, I never needed to do much of that, when I make a decision, the staff follows just because.

Anyways, yes, I am affected by this, yet again, though this time enough to get up and type this essay to make her seem less likeable. Maybe because I am indeed shallow, and this was the first woman in my love life who'd been actually slim and pretty. My first attempt at reaching for something beyond the low-hanging fruits. Yet again this proves that if someone seems too amazing to be single at this age without getting divorced, there has to be a good reason for that, although one man's meat may be another man's poison, so I'm just hoping to find someone whose big reason for being single is something I can swallow with ease.

 

Strange that I am typing this little essay just less than a week after saying she seemed serious about us. How terrible I must be at judging people. In fact, the entirety of this little episode has been recorded in this one rant, not that I normally say much about any of my relationships here.

A friend had been pushing for a mutual friend. Should I consider? Of course I must wait, probably a month, before actually deciding.

In any case, I wanted to try to work on it because of the Taiwanese girl. On hindsight, it might have been a better idea to have persisted rather than move on so quickly as was typical of me, but regardless, it is the past, a lesson that I have learnt. And again, to be frank, her religion was a massive turn-off, and I did not know it was normal to have a date just once a fortnight.

And that is all. Hope getting this off my chest will help me sleep tonight. It's a quarter passed one, and I've to get up at six.

6.30am now with my morning coffee. She told me her cousin had her phone while they were drunk, so I might have messed up.

Rant 1271 / Clinical Placement

10th June 2022

Got covid on Tuesday. Got more phlegm on Monday but it wasn't particularly unusual, so didn't think much of it. Two friends got it on Monday after our group dinner at Rivervale on Saturday night. Tested myself as a close contact on Monday evening, but negative. Sinus got sore on Tuesday so tested again just before leaving home for school, wasn't going to do it but thought since the kits were free, might as well use it and be nice to my classmates. Positive almost immediately, no 15min wait.

First, notified the group of friends, and another one came up positive too. Fortunately no more since then. Next, notified my project group since they were closest to me during school hours. Third, notified the tutor in charge of my class overall, but she took a while to check her phone. Meanwhile news had been spreading from my project group. By the time tutor replied that the entire class was close contacts, everyone knew, and my announcement that they had to test daily for five days merely brought the usual "take care" and stuff like that. No big deal, most of us were young and everyone was fully vaccinated.

First day was ok at first and I could stand around for hours outside the clinic waiting for my turn in the morning, but a fever set in by 3pm. Took some panadol and it went away the following morning. Sore throat/sinus and phlegm were still going strong by second day, though the former left on the third day. Still lots of phlegm today, day four, and still testing positive, so I am stuck in self-isolation. Current protocol is to be like this till I test negative, or when it reaches noon of the seventh day, in this case the day being the coming Monday, so I'll have to attend one class that day if there is no more symptom by noon even if the ART still shows two lines.

So finally got the mood to build the PC while having covid. Took two tries because the mount pins weren't very even at first.  Now I know why some cases are worse than others. In this case, this Armageddon Tron 3 case was priced at S$50 because of very good reasons.

First, there are only two spots for storage drives and no case for SDDs. One of these spots is also the location for two frontal fans, forcing you to choose between a storage drive or fans there. The other spot is flat on the bottom panel of the casing merely 1-2cm from the PSU.

Second, there is so little clearance between the motherboard and the top panel that there isn't enough room to install my 120mm fans on top, and I estimate that maybe 90mm fans might fit.

So this means there is only a single 120mm fan working in the current setup - the rear exhaust fan, making this a negative pressure environment, so air is being sucked in unfiltered through all the gaps in the case.

I will buy a new case, and then use this terrible case for my old but still functional computer from the small form factor desktop. It's mini-ATX so there will be plenty of room for...everything. This will give me two computers, so I can use multiple screens.

So far, my business is still bringing in a decent amount each month similar to the quieter months of the past but without overhead costs anymore aside from the 30% going to my brother. If I weren't saving this for the future when this finite stream ends and my only income is my pay as a new nurse, I can't help but calculate that another cruise to Antarctica would have been within reach by next year.

Still, will I bear to liquidate and spend it when the time comes?

11th June 2022

This feels like a regular flu but one that takes much longer to recover from. Or maybe it's my age, I don't know for sure, I haven't got a proper flu in probably two years.

But without exercise, my mind is getting foggy again. My GP specifically said no exercise for two weeks, but... I can barely think...

Might make that shakh pilaf tomorrow. Got all the ingredients, ie raisins, dried apricots, almonds, saffron, basmati rice, chapatti, plus some onions and chicken as the meat to be cooked at the center. Should I cook it on the stove in a pot, or in my rice cooker?

Or should I miniaturise it by cooking it in portion-sized steel food containers that I use for my meal preps these days? But in this case, it will have to be either baked or steam since these containers can't go over direct flames.

Let's keep to the original recipe and cook it in a large pot on the stove. I'll figure out how to split it up afterwards. Going to be messy for sure.

12th June 2022

Maybe not today. Not enough space in the fridge.

13th June 2022

 

Second case is coming. Bought a little piece of resin art. Have a feeling it will be an eye-catching piece.

Suddenly so much procrastination. Something is off with my mindset. What's putting me off schoolwork? It just flooded me the day I got covid. This wasn't supposed to be a holiday but it effectively had become one. Good thing the last week was a bit of breather so I'm not behind on anything but one project. This weekend could be challenging.

Can see the brain fog in my language now. Can't exercise while having covid. Muscle mass and bone mass losses are expected, body fats gain too. At least I am eating cleaner these few days, though have to remember to stop putting the cabbage in with the mushroom when making my usual vegetable soup, because the cabbage cooks too easily.

And fresh shitake is just so much better than dried ones even in soup. Reminds me of the difference in coffee.

14th June 2022

Why is there loud banging at 2.40AM? It sounds low-pitched, so it's far away, maybe two floors or more up?

20th June 2022

Finally turned negative last Saturday morning, at the same time as my friends who got it with me on our gathering on Saturday two weeks prior.

Still some phlegm though.

So after the bourbon flight last Saturday evening at Yardbird, decided to look into affordable brandies, ended up with a cognac instead. Turns out Remy Martin was selling a 1738 which reviews describe as better than VSOP but definitely not a XO, making it a great introduction for newbies who want to know what XO tastes like.

It definitely was that. VSOP was too light, though still preferable to any whiskey, while XO is prohibitively expensive for my budget. I'm still on my old bottles that I drink sparingly, but if this was good enough, would be nice. So this was typed after my first glass of this 1738, and the plan is to have a XO side by side as comparison tomorrow.

Of course, have to take into account that a 700ml bottle of 1738 is S$100, though I can get it for as low as S$84, a third of the price of a usual bottle of a Martell XO Supreme that is my norm.

I might get another one to give away. So far, this is way better than another S$100 range whiskey that I've tasted.

21st June 2022

Exactly a fortnight without exercise - my last session was on the Tuesday I got diagnosed on, before going to school, not that I went to school since I took the test 5mins before I was supposed to leave.

Ok I really need to workout. Starting to feel sleepy in the morning. Strangely able to sleep on my right side when the left nostril is supposed to collapse whenever I do that.

My recent Sociology essay assignment made me think about my telemedicine consultation on the sixth day of covid, and came to the conclusion that my GP is really a lot nicer than most. Probably.

Besides the GP via video call, I've also been to the polyclinic several times. Maybe not the most diverse of experiences, but adding in second-hand accounts of how people I've met described their GPs, it dawned on me that doctors don't typically ask about their patients beyond their symptoms. For example, my doctor asked about my job, and when he found out I live alone, he was concerned about how I'd get food during my 3-day self-isolation. When the issue of MC came up previously, he found out I was now a nursing student, and asked about why I made the career switch.

As a nursing student, that really is what I am supposed to do, not the doctors. However, it is potentially beneficial for the doctor since the knowledge provides a better context for future diagnoses. In addition, he also builds rapport with patients through such questions, not only encouraging us to return in the future when we fall sick, but also lets us be more open about our symptoms.

Just did a taste test of both the Remy Martin 1738 and the Martell XO Supreme. Ok, going to stick with the XO despite being over double the price, maybe triple.

1738 has a sweeter taste, lighter body, followed by a sweet aftertaste that fades into something less pleasant before vanishing within 10s.

XO is less sweet, but much better body, smoother in terms of alcohol feel, and an aftertaste that just lingers for at least 15s. Perhaps a full minute or longer. The body is more complex too, much more enjoyable.

1738 is good for frequent sips, or for mixing. XO is truly for slow, relaxed sipping over the course of an evening.

Will not buy 1738 again, the second bottle I ordered will be either a gift or for cooking hotpot.

26th June 2022

Transferred new PC to the new casing and it couldn't boot past the BIOS, kept hanging at "Preparing Automatic Repair" with the orange DRAM LED lit. Playing around with the RAM sticks proved it wasn't their fault, switching the boot media proved it wasn't due to damaged boot files, so what's left is the CPU and mobo, both of which I can't test since I have no spares to swap them out with, therefore I have to get it repaired by an outside service. Since I won't want to carry it to the shop myself, it is going to cost a bit more, but found a shop offering a two-way delivery service on top of their repair services for an additional S$30 which seemed very reasonable.

It's like those times when you dislike something, but after a while you begin to wonder how bad it could be, so you give it a try, and then it reminds you exactly how bad it could be, so this is the moment when I recall exactly why I have always bought pre-assembled desktops, furthermore fuck everyone who ever tries to persuade me to build my own again.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Did a tasting of a VSOP, pisco, 1738 and XO, and came to the conclusion that for me, only the XO is worth it. The VSOP is much sweeter, rougher to the point where you can not only taste the alcohol but feel it evaporating somehow, with almost no depth in the body. The pisco, a brandy from Peru, is strange because it is savoury in the way a coffee can be sweet, as if it's almost there but not yet, like it's got everything that takes it to the point of being salt without actually being salty, not to mention it's the roughest of all.

The pisco might be interesting as a cooking ingredient.

Restarted my workout yesterday. Finally. Going back to what I was doing before - Body Beast's Cardio on weekends, one or two sessions of calisthenics on weekdays. The cardio was tough but on the quads, which is unexpected. I slowed down my pace from the beginning, so I didn't have to pause too often, but by the end of the session I could feel my heart going a bit too hard, yet it was my legs almost cramping a bit after sitting for hours in the evening that got my attention. Weird because I felt no reduction in leg strength during this cardio session which works out all body parts but to a lesser degree than those sessions that work specific parts.

Anyway, let's see how it goes today.

Ok, pretty good again, cardio improved, or maybe I just know my pace better. Stretched my quads twice as much today, it should not cramp anymore tonight. Arms didn't weaken too much, just that I struggle to do the initial eight proper pushups where the hands are at chest level, but did them just the same. So far so good. 

 

Calisthenics begin tomorrow.

Nope, still cramping.

29th June 2022

Calisthenics into the third day so far, having trouble going for the post-school session though. One session a day is really too light, just better than none, but it's insufficient in the long run.

Going to try cognacs and brandies outside of the big 4, eg Hine, Ferrand, and some slivovitz.

05th Aug 2022

So I went an entire month without updating this at all. Been busy in school, and then during this break that's ending this week.

Next week my clinical placement begins. As I'd told the nurse during my Hep B vaccination earlier, I feel ambivalent about it. On one hand, there is the excitement of finding out for real how it will be like, but on the other hand there is anxiety for encountering the unknown.

 

What is known is that we will all be in charge of one patient in a general ward for probably the entirety of the six weeks, and we will be expected to help with others, so in practice, our focus will most likely be on the entire ward with a bit of extra focus on our assigned patient for our case study.

Also about to have a second date with another match tomorrow. Not sure about her yet.

Got an electric bass, been practicing the basic fretting exercises the last two nights. Still have difficulty stretching my pinkie, but this instrument turned out to sound much better on a speaker than on headphones, so I'm using that on a very low volume.

Found more rattan chairs from a seller on Carousell that are the exact clones of the ones I got as a set, so these weren't custom-made unique sets but probably from a good brand in the past. Anyway, realised that these chairs are more comfortable if they're deeper, so tested the idea of having thinner cushions in my chairs and it worked. Now the plan is to get 5cm-thick cushions for the two chairs, not sure about the 2-seater.

Got tired of pilaf, finally finished my third consecutive batch.

Switched to strength-building exercises when the break started. The plan will be to do these on weekdays before work, then back to Body Beast Cardio on weekends and public holidays.

To build strength, the fundamental concept is about increasing the maximum contraction of my muscles. Of course having more muscle fibres help ie from hypertrophy, but I feel that I have enough for now and having more volume makes clothes uncomfortable. In any case, to focus on that, we can only train when the muscles are able to contract the most, ie when they are not tired at all, ie when they are at 100%. This means we are looking at few reps, long breaks, and many sets. Long breaks here refer to anything 2-5mins long, so this means a simple routine can take an hour. On the bright side, it's very chill, and I can actually do little chores during the 135s I give myself, excluding the time it takes to record my weights/reps and switch on the timer, and the time to go back to the weights and my mat. Overall my breaks are about 150s long, and I go back to each set feeling fresh.

One of the biggest benefits of creating my own routine is that it can fit the many requirements I have while keeping to my main goal of building strength, eg no loud noises from jumping/hopping, and work out my entire body especially my legs and back.

Initially the routine was from Pumpd but some of the exercises were too easy while others hurt. Fortunately the years I'd spent on workout videos have taught me a few moves and showed me my limits, so switching them to something else wasn't too hard once I understand which muscle group(s) they were meant to train.

Not doing calisthenics anymore but incorporated them into the current routine.

Main disadvantage of such routines is that because they take so long, I will have to get up really early. Some of them take an hour and a half!

Realised the bass guitar needs to be higher than simply resting on my lap, because my left wrist feels pain when I let go after some of the fretting exercises around the ninth fret. Holding it higher was much more comfortable.

Need a strap now. Fortunately there's the National Day sale coming up.

Still not going to buy a stand because it could be rested on a folded towel in a corner.

06th Aug 2022

Fortunately my shifts will be around 7am-3pm or 1-9pm. This gives me plenty of time to work out before or after each day. Hopefully I will have the motivation after, but this is easier than expected, so have to remind myself in the bigger picture, this is very much within my abilities.

Meal preps will have to be done though. It doesn't seem likely that I would work out and cook after the earlier shifts, given the very high chance of my shifts ending an hour longer than stated here (estimated).

On the bright side, I will rarely encounter the peak hours.

Still trying to figure out how to solve the issue of sagging mattresses. Even the hardest mattress I've ever used is sagging in the centre, in addition to the fact that I had the same issue with a S$3000 mattress before it, so there isn't a point in buying another one.

For a few weeks trying to fill the pit with folded towels seemed to work but not anymore, and the issue is probably that the surface is uneven, so today I'm trying the idea of covering the area I sleep on with multiple layers of body-length towels. It is less sensible but if the most logical answer isn't working, maybe I'm just not smart enough to see other factors.

And if this doesn't work, I might lay the latex mattress topper on the floor and see if sleeping on that works, like a rubber tatami.

07th Aug 2022

As expected, didn't work, it was really nice at the beginning but still sagged in the center by morning. Not trying to sleep on the floor tonight, my first day of clinical placement is tomorrow. Will try tomorrow night since the following day is a holiday. Was pretty awesome to see the Red Lions so close while they flew past my window, helps me appreciate this whole celebration more. I could almost make out his face just now, the last guy with the national flag who had over 150 jumps under his belt. Still nothing compared to professional jumpmasters who jump in tandem with paying tourists, but things are done differently in the military iirc.

Not going to go for a third date with this one, we don't have chemistry.