Sunday 4 March 2007

Rant 031 / Kidnap Is An Exciting Fundraising Activity

Singapore is a democratic country that has been ruled by one political party ever since its independence. This has proven to be no obstacle to its growth, given that it has progressed from being a Third-World country to First-World in less than half a century. Note that this is an unprecedented achievement in Asia. What's even better about Singapore is that no one has had to go through the troubles of voting for a President since there has never been more than one candidate in any of the Presidential Elections. This indicates the stringent rules set by the government in order to choose only the best possible Presidential Candidate for the people.

In Singapore, the national religion is Capitalism. The Sacred Symbol of this widespread religion, the $, can be found anywhere in the country. Certain basic concepts are also used heavily in the nation's penal system, where many crimes are punished with fines. Due to Capitalism's immense tolerance of any other religions, especially the ones that require devotees to buy religious materials regularly, Singapore enjoys a multitude of religions that work cohesively with the national religion. It is surprising, though, that Scientology has almost no presence here. This phenomenon has baffled many sociologists and economists since Scientology is known to attract the rich and famous.

Singapore's national sport is DoTA. It is a game that is especially popular among males in their teens and 20s. In this game, the objective is to remove a certain structure from the opposite base. Members of the two teams, each controlling one side of the field, use their agility and guile to defeat opposite members. It is an intense and exciting game that is usually played indoors. The best teams are known to be sponsored by various companies, and the trophy prize in this sport is still growing with each tournament.

Singaporean culture is a combination of many foreign cultures. Unless one can call this mixture a culture on its own, Singapore has almost no local culture that is truly created by its people. Singapore literature reflects its culture with many writers who are able to create literary works in many languages. However, few or none of these literature are written in Singlish, the language that is invented by Singaporeans and the language of choice of many locals. This is not surprising given that the government does not provide much support for this language native to Singapore. Singapore's rich heritage in literary works is also largely unknown by the general population, except for the works of Catherine Lim and Jack Neo. They are considered, by some, as anomalies of the local literature scene as they are actually known by more than half the population (at least in the case of Jack). The general ignorance of the people of many local writers can be attributed to the fact that many Singaporeans have a certain amount of disdain for local works, though this is beginning to wane with the appearance of local diva Stephanie Sun. It can be considered an amazing phenomenon that she is actually famous in Singapore. For a while, it was believed that she would replace the $ as the Sacred Symbol in Singapore, though this has proven to be false.

Singapore has a highly developed market-based economy, which historically revolves around extended entrepot trade. The economy depends heavily on GST, which has been growing at a significant rate in recent years. Its manufacturing industry is well-diversified in petroleum and water refining.

Singaporean cuisine is the preferred attraction used in the promotion of tourism of Singapore. Unlike the rest of Singaporean culture, Singaporean cuisine has made great progress in creating unique local flavours. NEWater, a type of beverage with a truly Singaporean tang*, is a product that is wholly made by Singapore, in Singapore. Though it only contributes 1% of Singapore's potable water requirements, readers must know that its first factories were completed in 2002. About 94% of this product is currently being used in various non-potable applications.

The military of Singapore serves primarily as a deterrent to potential immigrants under the age of 19. Singapore employs conscription for all males. Compulsory military training and service lasting up to 2 years can begin for boys as young as 17. During this period, the boys are trained intensively in their running speed and endurance. This is very important as the distance from Singapore to Malaysia is far beyond the abilities of the average amateur Singaporean runner. Singapore has mutual defence pacts with several countries, most notably the Five Power Defence Arrangements. Strangely enough though, over half of the countries involved are not anywhere near Singapore.

The national language of Singapore is Singlish, and it is used in the national anthem, "Majulah Singapura". The official languages are English, Mandarin,Malay and Tamil. English has been promoted as the country's language of administration since independence, but Singlish is the language that is spoken by the majority of the population.

*Tang in this context is defined as "the distinctive flavor or quality of a thing"

Warning: Don't believe what you're reading here! I'm telling you right now, I've included lies in the above rant!

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