26th Dec 2022
So I've had an eye patch for a while, not sure if it has been mentioned before. Very rarely used for a few reasons, but decided I should really use them because my weaker eye may be turning lazy. Not sure if it's just me but it seems like one eye is moving less when I look in different directions, and it would be very much preferable to keep my eyes moving at the same rate at all times. So, using an eye patch to cover my stronger eye will reattune my brain to using this weaker eye, but while it's on, my depth perception is gone, and there have been at least one occasion when I accidentally touched something hot because of it, though fortunately nothing fragile has been knocked off somewhere high yet.
Thought one convo was stopped, but her last reply was to ask for my number. Interesting - thought she wasn't interested judging by her short replies and that she couldn't meet till months later. Still, not sure how this could be sustained. Chances are, I'll be meeting someone else earlier than that.
31st Dec 2022
The Aeron is legit. Been feeling weird in my back lately, didn't flip my mattress topper regardless. Today, I had to brace my back when walking and turning, no idea if it is going to be safe to sit on the floor. Not a sprain yet, but close to one. Yet once I settle into the Aeron, all of it went away immediately. Yes, the chair is worth its price, whole-heartedly agree. Herman Miller has gained another fan now.
Six matches on CMB, but only the latest one might have any chance of a date in the foreseeable future. She prefers to chat more before meeting, so I asked a little too early.
But she seems amazing so hope this one works out.
Also a Chinese language teacher, though a local one this time. If we ever meet up, I could then say I have a strange affinity for Chinese language teachers.
Also, another like last night, though one chat is expiring later so it will still be six matches if I like her enough when her profile pops up at noon later.
02nd Jan 2023
Six chats and only one alive as of today, the Chinese teacher hasn't replied since before noon yesterday. The latter isn't a big issue, she might be busy in JB as she'd mentioned that earlier when I asked her out. In any case, somehow I feel lonely again today. I know I have friends to talk to, but I don't want to talk to them, and it would be nice if the reason could be discernable.
Back is feeling a little better today, might be back to normal tmr. Hopefully. I want to try sleeping on the topper directly on the bed frame, which effectively will make it a futon.
Part of the reason of my sprain might be that I've been sitting down more often. The other possible factor could be the fact that I really haven't been working out enough.
Ok, the Chinese teacher replied again, and seems to be more keen on talking now. Apparently she left on the eve and only just got back, so she was talking even in JB, which was sweet.
So I finally understand why buying insurance is not betting that you'll suffer whatever the policy covers.
First, we must understand what a gamble is. Before the bet is made, when you are holding on to your money, there is no risk. Once the bet is made, there is now a risk - the risk of losing it, in exchange for the chance to gain more.
So now on to insurance. Before you buy the policy, the risks are already there. The act of spending money on the bet does not change any of the odds of whatever the policy covers happening to you. Therefore, it is different from betting on your death because to bet on your death, you have to be immortal beforehand, and to add on, is there really a profit on your part? Maybe to the people around you, but you will never gain anything worthwhile from such a bet, making it a terrible gamble.
Instead, the insurer is the real gambler, because before you buy the policy, the insurer has no risk of losing money (since the only change that the insurance would affect as far as the insurer is concerned is monetary), but when you buy the policy, suddenly the insurer has a risk - the risk of you making a claim before the company earns enough money from your premiums to pay you. So in effect, when you buy a policy, the insurer is betting that the company will make enough profit from your premiums before you file a claim, and the house/dealer is the world.
You're just the scenario, the game of blackjack, the roll of dice. You're paying money to become the rolling dice.
And there is indeed a consistent winner in this gamble - the funeral parlour.
03rd Jan 2023
Today marks an end to my business - the final eleven cartons are about to be sent out. This will also be the last time I engage my transporter guy for work. Of course it feels a little sad.
04th Jan 2023
So my mattress is definitely sunken in the centre, and no flipping will help. I am tempted to really try the idea of placing the topper on a hard surface like the bed frame, but there's a big test tomorrow and I need sleep.
On the other hand, it might suck to sleep on the mattress too.
My back still hurts a bit today, and rolling around, I can feel it's easier to roll into the centre than it is to roll to the edges of the mattress. Perhaps it is time to consider the futon style of sleeping.
Feels a bit bad for my transporter. The cataract in one of his eyes is quite obvious, his eyesight isn't great, his driving can't be very safe. Business is unpredictable according to him, and it is hard for him to move on to other things because his kids are still in school, making it a major challenge to take any serious risk to his income. But he must move away from his current line asap because of his eye and his bad back.
Wonder what he can do.
05th Jan 2023
Removed my topper instead, and went back to sleeping directly on my hard mattress, and so my back recovered much faster over last night. Feels almost normal now, as compared to the minor recovery over the night before. Will restart my workout this weekend, but carefully.
The conversation with the Chinese teacher is going great, and rather than asking her out this weekend, I've opted to bring the convo out of CMB first. Seems like quite an adorable person, reserved, absolutely beautiful, in the not-so-distant past she'd have been considered out of my league. I guess my confidence has grown.
Still trying to get her to talk and open up. Clearly she's keen on keeping the conversation going because I threw her a few simple observational statement replies and she responded regardless, but most of what she says tends to be short. Question here is whether I haven't found the areas she's really excited about, or she prefers our conversations to be in Chinese.
She's local, so the latter might be unlikely, but who knows?
Anyways, might also be counting my chickens before they hatch.
Re-read my last post. Could barely recall the Brazilian woman now. Wonder how strange it is going to feel to read something from years ago, like I did a long time ago with my very first post.
Thought I'd fail my Pathophysiology and Pharmacology test, but turned out it wasn't an F, nor was it a D, but a C+. I am amazed.
Keen on getting a bamboo sax but my electric bass is too neglected for me to justify spending S$335 on it.
Big Anatomy test later. Confident enough for a C, maybe a B.
Next week is something of a killer again. One final big presentation on Monday morning, a simulation lab class that requires some homework on Tuesday, an escape-room style simulation lab class that requires a bit of revision beforehand on Wednesday, a simulated panel interview and a major test on Thursday, ending with another test on Friday.
And overarching this entire week are two case study essays we have to complete by the following week, which may be lighter but is also meant for mugging for one actual exam paper.
TBH this is still relatively ok compared to uni life. Really makes me wonder how they survive over in the university version of this programme because it will also be accelerated by a year.
A bit of rest tonight and back to the mugging tmr.
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