Yesterday I met this taxi-driver who reminded me how fortunate I am to be able to get a place in an university. Not that I needed one, but some taxi-drivers like to talk when they drive. I believe it helps to give the image that they have godly driving skills and are able to drive at break-neck speeds on the AYE without concentrating on the road.
Drivers need car insurances, and passengers need life insurances.
He was talking about how he couldn't get a job after years of working at some construction company and got retrenched even though he has so much experience. I was suggesting that he could try SIM, since he looked like he was in his 20s, and I assumed he was just an unfortunate poly grad.
That was when he told me he was 34, with 3 kids, and only managed to study up to Sec 1. He had many certificates of all the courses he had attended during those years at the company, including courses on "fork-lifting", "crane-operation"...
Ouch.
Indeed, the government has encourage us to "upgrade" ourselves by attending courses to learn stuff that will make us more "useful". But I do not believe this is what they were thinking about when they said it.
My impression of what they mean by "upgrade" had been to learn things that cannot be learnt easily through a day of On-Job-Training, a.k.a. job orientation. There is a vast difference between learning how to fully utilise MS Excel and a cash register. (Well, if there is a course on fork-lifting then what's wrong with a course on cash register operations?)
It's like making a librarian-to-be attend a course on how to manage a library. I'm sure there are such courses somewhere, in the U.S. if not Singapore. They probably squeeze 50 bucks out of you and, in exchange, teach you how to avoid paper-cuts in 5 days of 2-hour lessons.
"And tomorrow, we'll show you how to wrap plasters around the cut when you do get a paper-cut..."
Okay, I admit there are many people who find it difficult to learn things some of us take for granted. But some things seem so simple I cannot believe external professionals are required to teach them to employees. It can't be too hard to find an older veteran of the job to show the newbies the ropes.
Maybe it's a new company, then there's the need for external professionals. Or maybe they got new equipments. Fork-lifters with many new functions? LOL! Hmm... Then what I don't understand is how he expect to get jobs with such certificates. It may make him better than foreign workers, but their incredibly low wages more than make up for their lack of experience. And those guys will kill to work for peanuts.
And for him to get an O-level cert and then a poly diploma is not much better. By the time he's done, he's in his 40s and who wants a 40-year-old poly grad with experience in nothing but construction work and taxi-driving?
Sad. With 3 kids, I do not see how he can make ends meet when they're older. No doubt, he won't be able to support them if they ever make it to any universities, and though insurances may help, it won't be easy for him to pay the premiums in the years to come.
And on the subject of foreign workers, I once knew this Indian air-conditioner technician who's got a diploma. How can we compete with such over-qualified people who are willing to work for less than a thousand, with no year-end bonus and welfare stuff?
And China is worse. Not only do they have such people, they are able to produce goods at obscenely low prices too. Some may not understand the depth of this problem, and I can only recommend playing Civilization IV(or I, II, III, for that matter) to fully comprehend the power of massive numbers.
In the Civilization series, I find that if I can create as many cities as I can in the beginning, while ignoring just about everything but avoiding bankruptcy, I can prosper like Bill Gates with his Windows 95 at the end. I do not bother to build any armies except for a few units to protect me from barbarians.
When anyone dares to attack me, I simply put all my cities' production to military units. Yes, they may take a few cities at first, but my overwhelming production rate can produce an obscene army in a few turns. Nothing can kill me, but I can kill anyone, if I feel like waging wars.
There is no way Singapore can compete with the PRC in the future, when it prospers enough to be considered a developed country. What stops China's cheap goods from taking over the markets of many countries, including the U.S., is that they all have quotas on Chinese goods.
For now, Chinese goods are still notoriously unreliable, especially since the authorities are unable to fully control the quality. It is not unheard of for their factories to use toxic dyes that are banned in most countries in the clothes they make. Frequent checks before they ship the stuff you ordered are necessary if you want to import goods from China and still maintain your reliability.
But no one can resist the low prices they offer! When the prices are low enough, people are willing to take chances even when the consequences are really bad. A few months ago in a Taiwanese news report, they interviewed a Chinese factory where they package pork taken from pigs that have died from diseases. Such pork are really cheap, and many restaurants use it.
Would you stop eating there when you've read this? Of course not. You'd take the chance when you see the prices of the food there.
Another time they interviewed a factory that makes "wine" from water, grape juice and industrial alcohol. This wine was sold at less than s$0.50 each! That's cheaper than mineral water! And they were packaged in boxes that looked exactly the same as those you'd see in wine shops.
If someone offers this sort of wine for sale at decently low prices in Singapore, anyone without experience in wine would fall for it.
Singaporeans cannot compete with such unscrupulous people, trusting as we are in the clean environment we grow up in. Someday when more of them expand their businesses outwards, they will bring their ways with them and push this sort of low cunning to a whole new level.
Someday in the future when they are rich enough, they will no longer have problems in reliability. What then?
We need to learn about corruption. Not legalised corruption, but the illegal sort. We need to learn to bribe cops, and local cops need to learn to accept bribes. Our authorities need to be bias towards stingy companies, and suck up to the richer ones. Bigger corporations need to find ways to monopolise the markets to some extent, and let the smaller fishes die.
PAP needs to get fundings from more private companies, especially oil companies, not just from the current sources. We need to drive in the opposite lane once in a while. Someone need to give the local triads a boost in the entertainment industry. And we need a porn industry.
Students need to learn to smoke weed. Condoms should be sold in schools. Ecstasy should be made more accessible to the public. Alcohol should be legally sold to anyone of any age, but minors should be banned from drinking. I need my kids to go downstairs to buy beer for me, and not drink it for me on the way up.
Smoking should be made legal anywhere. I mean, you get the same sort of shit from having one-night-stands, yet no one's making a fuss about it and creating gross posters on the dangers of STDs! Shit, I want to see advertisements of syphilis-infected vaginae on TV! Let my kids see what they'll get if they stick their manhood in too many holes.
We need Soylent Green.
Wednesday, 18 April 2007
Thursday, 12 April 2007
Rant 049 / I Came, I Yawned, I Concurred
The last 2 movies I watched involving magicians and their acts were really interesting. The Illusionist and The Prestige were pretty cool. Usually you'd know, roughly, what to expect in the end of most films, but in these two, the plots are similar to good magic tricks - the actions of the artists always guide your minds away from the truth.
The plots in both are deeply intertwined with two magic tricks, one for each. Each magic trick is fascinating by themselves, and immediately sets you thinking about how they accomplished the tricks.
Warning: The following text might contain spoilers. This makes the article more aerodynamic, and thus more maneuverable at high speeds. Take caution and carry a first-aid kit at all times if you don't know that Snape kills Dumbledore, Prince Arthas kills his father and, in the expansion pack, merges with the Lich King, the Elites, Hunters, and most of the Grunts all rebel against the Hierarchs and civil war ensues on High Charity, Church gets killed by Caboose by accident, but then comes back as a ghost, Tony gets shot by Chino and dies in Maria's arms, the *real* final boss isn't this guy, it's the Ur-Grue, the Wizard of Yendor comes back to life, Michael Newman wakes up in Bed, Bath and Beyond and discovers it was all a dream, Nately's Whore falls in love with Nately, but only after he dies, and Soylent Green is PEOPLE!!!
I copied the above paragraph from Uncyclopedia. And it's true. Spoilers below. And above, if you're unfortunate enough to be reading/going to read or watch the stuff mentioned. LOL!
In The Prestige, the secrets behind the trick for each of the two magicians involved are nothing the viewer could have expected when watching the film. Even the seemingly fully described mechanism invented by Dr Tesla in the film has a stunning secret behind it. Well, not anymore if are reading this LOL! After watching it, one of the words that may very likely be in your mind would be "Whoa!"
In The Illusionist, the whole plot is a trick! Everyone gets tricked, except the magician and his lover. Yes, everyone including the audience. In fact, there is a trick in this movie that makes you think it is done in a way that it is not, even though they have shown you how they do it. A trick behind a trick, I guess.
I like watching magic tricks. And it's true that I don't search for the secrets behind tricks because I want to be tricked.
Btw I only understand the parts about Snape/Dumbledore, Arthas/Lich King and Soylent Green. I hope I won't be reading anything that involves the rest of the characters LOL!
And all the blue words are links to articles. Uncyclopedia is so crazy it has articles on "This guy", "That guy" and "Some guy" ROFL! 3 different articles, I assure you. Other seemingly pointless articles include "Me", "You", "Him", "Her", "Them", "They" "I", "It". Most of them aren't as funny as the fact that they are actually there :D .
Uncyclopedia has many of its articles themed according to their titles. Like the article on "Morse Code" is entirely in Morse Code, the one on "Binary Code" is completely typed in binary code and etc. Heck, even "Dyslexia" is created such that it appears like what dyslexics see words as. Just search for "Dilsexya"...
It always amazes me what people can whine about. Like in this C&C3 forum I visited, someone was complaining that players can't build walls in the game. I'm waiting for someone to whine about why players can't build concrete floors the way we did in RA2.
Tanks/planes can shoot over walls, obviously, so they don't protect anything against these two. Infantry cannot get past walls, but who uses only infantry to attack any bases?
And why would anyone need walls, since a defensive stance has never won anyone any tournament? Turtling is only useful to a degree, but to go to the extent of building a walled fortress is pointless - artilleries will raze the defenses.
In Supreme Commander, players can build walls, but they're never used in normal games. They're there only to make the campaign scenarios look good.
This is not the first time I'm stunned by this sort of thing. We call ourselves intelligent lifeforms but obviously this doesn't apply to some.
What makes a good conversationalist? I know how to be a bad one, too well for my liking. I don't talk much to anyone simply because I cannot think of anything interesting to talk about with anybody.
Maybe it is because I have nothing in common with anyone? Maybe I have to fake interest sometimes. I am never interested in talking about things that I know the other person already knows, because we both know them!
Many times I have found myself disagreeing with people simply to lengthen the conversation. I mean, what's there to say if we all agree on the matter? We all say yes and that's it.
Do I gossip? I don't know. I don't bother to remember rumours and stuff anyway.
And I don't volunteer my opinions on most things because I'm usually not interested in your opinions. Unless it's a place I'm planning to go, or something I'm going to be involved in.
I haven't been observing my own actions enough to understand what stops me from talking. Usually I'm the one who stays silent in conversations and only interrupts once in a while to contribute a comment here and there. I do not initiate conversations, but I do end them often by being silent. Hell, maybe I can be considered as a good listener LOL!
Even if I can somehow chat for an extended period of time, I cannot focus on any one topic throughout a conversation. I do not have much to say about anything, and I noticed I tend to "jump around" during any chats.
Sometimes people ask me questions that I have no decent answer for, like "What's up?" In my present situation, nothing's up. I'm staying home all day playing pc games and reading and enjoying my last days of worry-free holidays. How many words can I use to describe nothing? Well, a lot, actually, but none are things that people would say in most conversations.
What sort of a problem do I have, if it is a problem at all?
If this is not a problem, then I have just described nothing with 9 paragraphs. LOL!
The plots in both are deeply intertwined with two magic tricks, one for each. Each magic trick is fascinating by themselves, and immediately sets you thinking about how they accomplished the tricks.
Warning: The following text might contain spoilers. This makes the article more aerodynamic, and thus more maneuverable at high speeds. Take caution and carry a first-aid kit at all times if you don't know that Snape kills Dumbledore, Prince Arthas kills his father and, in the expansion pack, merges with the Lich King, the Elites, Hunters, and most of the Grunts all rebel against the Hierarchs and civil war ensues on High Charity, Church gets killed by Caboose by accident, but then comes back as a ghost, Tony gets shot by Chino and dies in Maria's arms, the *real* final boss isn't this guy, it's the Ur-Grue, the Wizard of Yendor comes back to life, Michael Newman wakes up in Bed, Bath and Beyond and discovers it was all a dream, Nately's Whore falls in love with Nately, but only after he dies, and Soylent Green is PEOPLE!!!
I copied the above paragraph from Uncyclopedia. And it's true. Spoilers below. And above, if you're unfortunate enough to be reading/going to read or watch the stuff mentioned. LOL!
In The Prestige, the secrets behind the trick for each of the two magicians involved are nothing the viewer could have expected when watching the film. Even the seemingly fully described mechanism invented by Dr Tesla in the film has a stunning secret behind it. Well, not anymore if are reading this LOL! After watching it, one of the words that may very likely be in your mind would be "Whoa!"
In The Illusionist, the whole plot is a trick! Everyone gets tricked, except the magician and his lover. Yes, everyone including the audience. In fact, there is a trick in this movie that makes you think it is done in a way that it is not, even though they have shown you how they do it. A trick behind a trick, I guess.
I like watching magic tricks. And it's true that I don't search for the secrets behind tricks because I want to be tricked.
Btw I only understand the parts about Snape/Dumbledore, Arthas/Lich King and Soylent Green. I hope I won't be reading anything that involves the rest of the characters LOL!
And all the blue words are links to articles. Uncyclopedia is so crazy it has articles on "This guy", "That guy" and "Some guy" ROFL! 3 different articles, I assure you. Other seemingly pointless articles include "Me", "You", "Him", "Her", "Them", "They" "I", "It". Most of them aren't as funny as the fact that they are actually there :D .
Uncyclopedia has many of its articles themed according to their titles. Like the article on "Morse Code" is entirely in Morse Code, the one on "Binary Code" is completely typed in binary code and etc. Heck, even "Dyslexia" is created such that it appears like what dyslexics see words as. Just search for "Dilsexya"...
It always amazes me what people can whine about. Like in this C&C3 forum I visited, someone was complaining that players can't build walls in the game. I'm waiting for someone to whine about why players can't build concrete floors the way we did in RA2.
Tanks/planes can shoot over walls, obviously, so they don't protect anything against these two. Infantry cannot get past walls, but who uses only infantry to attack any bases?
And why would anyone need walls, since a defensive stance has never won anyone any tournament? Turtling is only useful to a degree, but to go to the extent of building a walled fortress is pointless - artilleries will raze the defenses.
In Supreme Commander, players can build walls, but they're never used in normal games. They're there only to make the campaign scenarios look good.
This is not the first time I'm stunned by this sort of thing. We call ourselves intelligent lifeforms but obviously this doesn't apply to some.
What makes a good conversationalist? I know how to be a bad one, too well for my liking. I don't talk much to anyone simply because I cannot think of anything interesting to talk about with anybody.
Maybe it is because I have nothing in common with anyone? Maybe I have to fake interest sometimes. I am never interested in talking about things that I know the other person already knows, because we both know them!
Many times I have found myself disagreeing with people simply to lengthen the conversation. I mean, what's there to say if we all agree on the matter? We all say yes and that's it.
Do I gossip? I don't know. I don't bother to remember rumours and stuff anyway.
And I don't volunteer my opinions on most things because I'm usually not interested in your opinions. Unless it's a place I'm planning to go, or something I'm going to be involved in.
I haven't been observing my own actions enough to understand what stops me from talking. Usually I'm the one who stays silent in conversations and only interrupts once in a while to contribute a comment here and there. I do not initiate conversations, but I do end them often by being silent. Hell, maybe I can be considered as a good listener LOL!
Even if I can somehow chat for an extended period of time, I cannot focus on any one topic throughout a conversation. I do not have much to say about anything, and I noticed I tend to "jump around" during any chats.
Sometimes people ask me questions that I have no decent answer for, like "What's up?" In my present situation, nothing's up. I'm staying home all day playing pc games and reading and enjoying my last days of worry-free holidays. How many words can I use to describe nothing? Well, a lot, actually, but none are things that people would say in most conversations.
What sort of a problem do I have, if it is a problem at all?
If this is not a problem, then I have just described nothing with 9 paragraphs. LOL!
Wednesday, 11 April 2007
Rant 048 / If You Fight Death, You Live For Nothing
Someday, if I open a restaurant, I'm going to name it This Life Or The Next.
If it is going to offer set meals, I'm going to name them My Second Childhood, My Previous Marriage, Pre-Nuptial Agreement and The Next Phase Of My Life. If more is needed, more will be created then.
If you don't understand, imagine a customer inviting a friend to eat at my restaurant. He's going to say something like," Let's eat at This Life Or The Next!" or "I'm going to eat at This Life Or The Next. Wanna join me?"
And when a waiter introduces customers to the set meals, they're going to say something like," In My Previous Marriage, we have chicken chops with..."
Or when a customer orders a meal, he might say," I'd like to have a Pre-Nuptial Agreement."
Makes the place easy to remember, eh?
And maybe the meals will be themed according to the name. Like My Second Childhood will have more traditional food or maybe it will contain more dessert like ice cream, My Previous Marriage will be a cheap meal(or call it "economy" if you like), and The Next Phase Of My Life will be something modern, whatever is considered modern or even futuristic at the time.
And I can name the chocolate sundae "Day Dreams", the vanilla milkshake "Sweet Dreams", and a dessert for two "Wet Dreams".
Heck, maybe I'll name a dish "Rentboy". Something really evil, really sinful. Maybe the chocolate-coated insects I saw somewhere. That's bound to confuse the police. "Yea, we have Rentboys here!"
And I'll name a pasta dish "Wife", and another "Mistress". "Wife" will be something more filling but has only average taste, and "Mistress" can be a really sweet and colourful dessert! Maybe they will even be the components of The Next Phase Of My Life!
And maybe a set called "Husband" that's basically beer and peanuts. LOL!
A restaurant like that is going to cost a bomb to maintain, with the variety of food that will be served.
C&C3 is good! The campaign is similar to Tiberian Sun in that all 3 campaigns revolve around the exact same story in the same time-line and that each campaign reveals different parts of the whole. And the Brutal AI is tough. Even Hard is pretty hard.
A Feast for Crows is very good too. Just what I expected from George R.R. Martin. Except that the book only focused on several of the current main characters.
And a "good" character dies again! Hanged by another "good" character gone mad! Talk about sudden twists. If you follow the series you'd never have expected that person to be the one to hang her.
But my favourite Tyrion is missing! The author has stated that he will appear in the next book along with the rest of the missing people. That means another year or two of waiting. Again :/
But at the rate the deaths are going, much of the plots in the series will be obsolete, and useless if you just want to understand the ending, because there is almost no connection between some of the dead people and the final part of the story. It's simply too long a chain.
If it is going to offer set meals, I'm going to name them My Second Childhood, My Previous Marriage, Pre-Nuptial Agreement and The Next Phase Of My Life. If more is needed, more will be created then.
If you don't understand, imagine a customer inviting a friend to eat at my restaurant. He's going to say something like," Let's eat at This Life Or The Next!" or "I'm going to eat at This Life Or The Next. Wanna join me?"
And when a waiter introduces customers to the set meals, they're going to say something like," In My Previous Marriage, we have chicken chops with..."
Or when a customer orders a meal, he might say," I'd like to have a Pre-Nuptial Agreement."
Makes the place easy to remember, eh?
And maybe the meals will be themed according to the name. Like My Second Childhood will have more traditional food or maybe it will contain more dessert like ice cream, My Previous Marriage will be a cheap meal(or call it "economy" if you like), and The Next Phase Of My Life will be something modern, whatever is considered modern or even futuristic at the time.
And I can name the chocolate sundae "Day Dreams", the vanilla milkshake "Sweet Dreams", and a dessert for two "Wet Dreams".
Heck, maybe I'll name a dish "Rentboy". Something really evil, really sinful. Maybe the chocolate-coated insects I saw somewhere. That's bound to confuse the police. "Yea, we have Rentboys here!"
And I'll name a pasta dish "Wife", and another "Mistress". "Wife" will be something more filling but has only average taste, and "Mistress" can be a really sweet and colourful dessert! Maybe they will even be the components of The Next Phase Of My Life!
And maybe a set called "Husband" that's basically beer and peanuts. LOL!
A restaurant like that is going to cost a bomb to maintain, with the variety of food that will be served.
C&C3 is good! The campaign is similar to Tiberian Sun in that all 3 campaigns revolve around the exact same story in the same time-line and that each campaign reveals different parts of the whole. And the Brutal AI is tough. Even Hard is pretty hard.
A Feast for Crows is very good too. Just what I expected from George R.R. Martin. Except that the book only focused on several of the current main characters.
And a "good" character dies again! Hanged by another "good" character gone mad! Talk about sudden twists. If you follow the series you'd never have expected that person to be the one to hang her.
But my favourite Tyrion is missing! The author has stated that he will appear in the next book along with the rest of the missing people. That means another year or two of waiting. Again :/
But at the rate the deaths are going, much of the plots in the series will be obsolete, and useless if you just want to understand the ending, because there is almost no connection between some of the dead people and the final part of the story. It's simply too long a chain.
Sunday, 8 April 2007
Rant 047 / Aren't The Fruits Of Your Loins The Nuts?
Even without religion, everyday we have good people doing good things, and bad people doing bad things. But for a good person to do bad things, or for a bad person to do good things, that requires religion.
Hence, if religion doesn't exist, we would be living in a very boring world. Everyone would only do what they are expected to do, and no one changes, for better or worse.
But our world doesn't like straight lines. People want good events, in exchange for bad things coming with the good. Everyone wants to see something different once in a while, and they are willing to pay the price.
Therefore, religion.
With religion, you have a powerful tool to convert people from one side to the other. In the name of their religions, good people have commited heinous deeds that can exceed the limits of our imagination. Numerous "justified" wars were started in the name of religion. The Crusades, the Reconquista and the French Wars of Religion are a few of the more frequently used examples.
And don't forget the Holocaust. Without Judaism, Hitler would have needed another reason to start the war. But then he wouldn't have had to go to Hell either, since Hell wouldn't exist if not for religion.
Often, the worst sort of people are those who do the immoral things that they do and see them as good. With religion, its easier to do so.
But with religion, criminals have turned good. Great things have been done in the name of religion. The construction of great wonders, like the Temple of Solomon(aka The First Temple), the Hagia Sophia in Turkey and the Sistine Chapel in the Apostolic Palace, are the results of religion.
On a side note, the Sistine Chapel was built to look like the Temple of Solomon, as described in the Old Testament. Copycat :P
Damn, but the Papacy sure serves their god in luxury.
Not only does religion do wonders in the field of architecture, it has also brought us many wonders that we take for granted these days. Like weekend holidays, for those of you who have them. Or Christmas - the day we consumers burn holes in our pockets just for the hell of it.
Or the Karma Sutra(कामसूत). Never forget the Karma Sutra, for without it, what sort of hell we would be living in? People should worship Mallanaga Vātsyāyana for displaying such intelligence and wisdom.
Consequently, in exchange for numerous public holidays, some nice buildings and a sex guide, humanity has killed innumerable lives and created Hell on Earth once in a while.
Let them kill me, as long as I get to sleep on Sundays.
This is what people want. Not eternal peace! They want to live lives that have their good times, in exchange for an equal amount bad times. Eternal peace would be boring, 'cause there wouldn't be hunger, which means no need for work.
So we would stay home all day and watch TV and/or masturbate on internet porn. Heck, there wouldn't be TV, since no one would be working at the TV station. So we would stay home all day and masturbate like wild baboons. On nothing, 'cause no one's working in the porn industry.
And eternal peace means there will be no deaths. So we would masturbate for eternity. Yea no girlfriends and shit 'cause love causes a lot of trouble, which ruins the peace.
With eternal peace, we will sit in our caves(no one would be building anything) and... just sit! Because cleaning up the mess afterwards also ruins the peace(hint: no tissues/condoms).
Whoa!
The Knife of Dreams is much better than many books in the series. Must be cos Robert Jordan finally decided to finish his work before he dies. Though I wish he'd decide to do that sooner. Now the tempo is completely off. It's like going at gear 2 for the previous 7 books(well, maybe not book 9) and suddenly at book 11, its gear 5. Almost makes it seem like it was written by a different author.
Scoop is a really bad movie! Woody Allen is good, but all his stuttering in the film really got on my nerves, not to mention gave me a headache. Grr..
Hence, if religion doesn't exist, we would be living in a very boring world. Everyone would only do what they are expected to do, and no one changes, for better or worse.
But our world doesn't like straight lines. People want good events, in exchange for bad things coming with the good. Everyone wants to see something different once in a while, and they are willing to pay the price.
Therefore, religion.
With religion, you have a powerful tool to convert people from one side to the other. In the name of their religions, good people have commited heinous deeds that can exceed the limits of our imagination. Numerous "justified" wars were started in the name of religion. The Crusades, the Reconquista and the French Wars of Religion are a few of the more frequently used examples.
And don't forget the Holocaust. Without Judaism, Hitler would have needed another reason to start the war. But then he wouldn't have had to go to Hell either, since Hell wouldn't exist if not for religion.
Often, the worst sort of people are those who do the immoral things that they do and see them as good. With religion, its easier to do so.
But with religion, criminals have turned good. Great things have been done in the name of religion. The construction of great wonders, like the Temple of Solomon(aka The First Temple), the Hagia Sophia in Turkey and the Sistine Chapel in the Apostolic Palace, are the results of religion.
On a side note, the Sistine Chapel was built to look like the Temple of Solomon, as described in the Old Testament. Copycat :P
Damn, but the Papacy sure serves their god in luxury.
Not only does religion do wonders in the field of architecture, it has also brought us many wonders that we take for granted these days. Like weekend holidays, for those of you who have them. Or Christmas - the day we consumers burn holes in our pockets just for the hell of it.
Or the Karma Sutra(कामसूत). Never forget the Karma Sutra, for without it, what sort of hell we would be living in? People should worship Mallanaga Vātsyāyana for displaying such intelligence and wisdom.
Consequently, in exchange for numerous public holidays, some nice buildings and a sex guide, humanity has killed innumerable lives and created Hell on Earth once in a while.
Let them kill me, as long as I get to sleep on Sundays.
This is what people want. Not eternal peace! They want to live lives that have their good times, in exchange for an equal amount bad times. Eternal peace would be boring, 'cause there wouldn't be hunger, which means no need for work.
So we would stay home all day and watch TV and/or masturbate on internet porn. Heck, there wouldn't be TV, since no one would be working at the TV station. So we would stay home all day and masturbate like wild baboons. On nothing, 'cause no one's working in the porn industry.
And eternal peace means there will be no deaths. So we would masturbate for eternity. Yea no girlfriends and shit 'cause love causes a lot of trouble, which ruins the peace.
With eternal peace, we will sit in our caves(no one would be building anything) and... just sit! Because cleaning up the mess afterwards also ruins the peace(hint: no tissues/condoms).
Whoa!
The Knife of Dreams is much better than many books in the series. Must be cos Robert Jordan finally decided to finish his work before he dies. Though I wish he'd decide to do that sooner. Now the tempo is completely off. It's like going at gear 2 for the previous 7 books(well, maybe not book 9) and suddenly at book 11, its gear 5. Almost makes it seem like it was written by a different author.
Scoop is a really bad movie! Woody Allen is good, but all his stuttering in the film really got on my nerves, not to mention gave me a headache. Grr..
Thursday, 5 April 2007
Rant 46 / Thou Shall Not Admit Adultery
LOL!
"I can feel it kicking!"It is found several years ago that green algae can produce hydrogen when deprived of sulfur. Researches at University of California have found that hydrogen production in green algae can be increased greatly by changing one of its genes called "hydrogenase".
By using the new version of this gene, hydrogen production has been increased by a factor of 100k. But to be commercially viable, it needs to be increased again by a factor of 100. One estimate is that an algae farm the size of Texas can supply enough energy for the whole world then. But it's still theoretical.
This sounds very exciting. Though the process is anaerobic, there's no way it can beat the CO2 output of oil usage. Hydrogen cars!!
Right now solar power is the best option, but solar panels are big and expensive, and not reliable enough in places with wet climates.
In PRC, there are places where you can eat human fetuses. They are believed to be very nutritious. And they're not cheap.
But there are other things that are just as strange. Like in Chinese medicine, the deer's penis is a cure for impotency. Usually they use a dried penis. Imagine using a fresh one... LOL!!!
But in Singapore, most people are ignorant of many herbs that are used in traditional Chinese medicine, even in "Chinese pharmacies". When I came to Singapore, my mum was quite shocked to find so many herbs unavailable in the so-called "Chinese pharmacies" in the neighbourhood.
Heck they don't even know those herbs when she mentioned them. In the end she had use what is available. Maybe she'd have better luck in the bigger pharmacies somewhere else but those will not come cheap.
I blame Confucius for making the Chinese lose in the race of technologies centuries ago!
No doubt he did many great things for our race like strengthening the belief in filial piety, among many others, but it was people like him who caused the Chinese to embrace only the old and distrust the new.
I can't deny it wasn't him alone who caused the ancient Chinese to be superstitious people, but he's a symbol of all the scholarly wisdom of the Chinese past. He almost made the Chinese who we are today, even though the first emperor of China burnt almost all his books back then.
Did you know that before that happened, days have to be chosen even for things like searching for thieves? For example, if a criminal was known to be born on the day of the Rat, constables to not look for him on all days of the Rat because he'd be doing everything better than he would on the other 11 days.
And by the way, back then there was no year belonging to each of the 12 animals, but days. Day of the Rat, then day of the Bull, etc.
Imagine how that hindered the productivity of the empire!
China was winning the race at the start, with its invention of the gunpowder. And the compass. And the earthquake detectors. And surgery. And ship hulls divided into multiple compartments(Titanic wasn't the first ship to use this concept!). And many others.
China did rule the sea with its technologically advanced ships, but they didn't like the idea of trading with foreign nations. The main objective of the fleets was to impress other kingdoms, exchange gifts with them, and collecting tributes.
The Chinese back then did not try to explore much, nor trade, which were exactly what the Europeans did later. Thus while the Chinese was having a great time being the greatest empire in Asia, Europeans built trade empires everywhere. Especially after the Napoleonic War.
Later the Spanish and Portuguese each created some of the greatest empires in the Americas by exploring new lands. The Spanish got filthy rich, with all that sacking and looting they did in the great cities on the American natives.
And what were the Chinese doing then? Because defending its northern and eastern borders was more important than impressing the kingdoms to the south, its navy was neglected while money was transferred to the armies from the navy. Soon its fleets were forgotten until one day the Japanese pirates arrived in large numbers. By then it was too late.
Even when European troops began improving on their muskets, the Chinese did not make enough advances in this field. True, muskets and cannons back then were unreliable compared to bows and crossbows. The first muskets could only be loaded and fired once before the enemy troops reach the musketeers.
Cannons were NOT accurate at all. Not that muskets were much better. None of their accuracy was really worthed a damn until someone discovered that a spinning bullet flies straighter.
But it was really too late by the time the Qing rulers finally saw that their armies and navies were hopelessly obsolete. Even though its armies were the first to use guns. Even though the Chinese invented the FLAMETHROWER!!! Even though the Chinese invented a primitive form of gunpowder missile!
(Yea this is the point where you should be thinking along the lines of WTF! and WTF?!?!?!)
Stagnation is the key point here. They believed themselves to be the greatest kingdom in the world, and were not interested in knowing the progress of the "barbarians".
But the Qing dynasty did try to improve its military in the end, and great generals did emerge. But its modernized armies, Beiyang Army for example, did not fare well at all in the wars to come. Its efforts to improve, like the Self-Strengthening Movement, was like a last-minute attempt to save the country.
And in the end, Qing collapsed and Yuan Shikai tried to be the next emperor and succeeded for a while. Sun Yat-Sen died of cancer and soon became forgotten. Mao Zedong and Chiang Kai-shek came along and fought each other. To this day, their followers are still fighting.
Disclaimer: There may be some mistakes above since I'm no history student. Do your own research if you're picky :P
Rant 45 / I Can't Believe It's Not Soylent Green!
Many ugly things have pretty names to enhance its attractiveness. Rocky mountain oysters, spam are just a few of such names that exist today. And Soylent Green, of course. What do they sound like to you, if you don't know what they are, exactly?
Rocky mountain oysters... some sort of oyster found in the mountains(omfg)?
Spam is Spam. Everyone knows what Spam is(the pork stuff, not the important emails from your boss).
Soylent Green.. sounds like some sort of biscuit?
Spam is made most parts of the pig, only excluding the ears, scalps, snouts, mucous membranes, sinews, genital systems, udders, intestines and urinary bladder. Which leaves us the "really edible" stuff like the lungs, heart, brains(?) and etc. And ham. Never forget the ham, lest you totally lose the desire for Spam.
Historically, the only part that has never been used in this family of products, is the pigs' penises. Just a little trivia.
Rocky mountain oysters are balls. Bulls' balls. Never a cow's balls cos that'd be a tranny's balls. And that's just so wrong.
Cows. Trannies. Sodomised bulls. And the chain goes on and on.
And Soylent Green! My favourite! It's fictional, but it sure sounds so interesting! It's made of people. The euthanized ones. Though at times I can imagine some would wish otherwise.
Well, there were other Soylents but they were never as popular as the Green version.
But what's wrong with offal? In Singapore alone you can find pigs' offal sold everywhere. It's an important part of the Chinese cuisine. In Hong Kong you can find barbecued cows' offal in the streets too. And they don't taste half bad!
There are worse things than eating these, if you find them distasteful at all in the first place. In the Philippines eggs with half-grown chicks in them are sold in the streets, boiled. Those who like this describe it as a 3-course meal. I can't remember exactly what these 3 courses are exactly except there's the soup and there's the main course. Go figure.
Of course I am interested in what this taste like. It's not like it's still alive. If you find this cruel, just think about what they do in abortions and you'll find this more acceptable. Or fresh seafood, for that matter.
In case you don't know how some types of fresh seafood are cooked, they are thrown into boiling water alive. Not all, just some.
Like certain shellfishes. Imagine the agony it goes through, being in the boiling water and not able to struggle at all.
Insects! That's one distasteful subject if it's seen as food. It's high in protein, no doubt. Thanks but no thanks, but I'll get my proteins from milk.
After all these "gross" stuff, all these boiling/eating things alive discussions, I can tell you for sure that if you think on what you see in those animal documentaries on Discovery or National Geographic Channel, you'd see that many animals in the wild are eaten alive.
Yes, most of them would be dead when they get eaten, but not all hungry animals are patient creatures. Like piranhas. Piranhas are edible, though it must take some guts to do that sort of fishing. You don't truly know what's a "frenzy" till you see them feed.
And after eating piranhas, the natives would save their jaws as cutters which they use for haircuts. Serious. It works.
Or snakes! Yea, snakes eat many things while they're still alive. They paralyze their preys and swallow them whole, which means if the prey doesn't suffocate soon enough, the stomach acids will have to do the rest. Which means a slow and painful death.
But this cruelty doesn't compare to what humans do to their food. How do you think they get sharks' fins? They catch that shark, cut it's fins off and throw it back. Alive. Where it's blood will probably attract other fishes, not excluding fellow sharks. Sharks are known to eat anything, even car tires. Since fishes need their fins to swim properly, it will die.
It will know it's injured and cannot escape other predators. It can struggle but it cannot win. And the other fishes will tear it apart alive, just like the rest of the preys.
Stop eating sharks' fins, if you want to help the world.
Stick with birds' nest, since it only kills humans. The careless ones.
Abalone is a strange food. It is hard to understand why anyone would want to pay hundreds of dollars to eat a big piece of shellfish. The rare ones are expensive only because they are rare, not because they are especially tasty. The reason for anyone to eat these abalones can be anything except for its delicious taste.
Abalones are good if they're boiled in water properly. There's no need to add much, maybe just some oyster sauce. You want to taste the abalone, not the chicken.
In case you don't understand, many restaurants use chicken soup to boil the abalones. But why the heck would you want chicken soup that's been boiled for days to cook the abalone with? And cook for hours? Yea it's definitely the essence of the chicken there, good stuff, but I want to taste the abalone, not the chicken.
It's like eating sushi with a fuckload of wasabi. Or noodles with the whole damned jar of chilli. You are losing the point of eating what you are eating, focusing too much on enhancing its taste to finally appreciate the work of the chef. If I were the chef, I'd feel insulted if you add too much of these "taste-enhancers" into what I cooked. It will mean you find the food unsatisfactory.
I see it as a good idea if you can eat that first bite without adding anything, unless recommended by the chef. This will give you an idea of how good the work is. The salt and pepper are there to improve the taste, and you should not mistake them for the main course.
As always there are people who do that, adding a hell of a lot of stuff to what they eat, mainly because they're there. These people are living in the wrong era. They belong to the post-WWII days when ketchup was a luxury of the rich, and the poor eat bark. Seriously, if you take things only because they're there for the taking, you should go for the recycling industry.
Maybe that's one reason why I really don't like cheaper buffets that are not ala carte. Call me spoilt. Call me sissy. But I don't like to push people, physically or not. I tend to hurt them when I do. It's some sort of a packaged deal. Comes with the "being big".
Reminds me of those times when I have middle-aged people squeeze into queues with me. Like going up buses or trains. I tend to move slowly so that I don't push anyone. I let the ladies go first 'cause they're easier to push down( if need be LOL!). I have a rough idea of what my "slight push" means to other weaker people. Kinda.
A few them have even stared at me and pushed past me to go for the seats! Well, if I have to choose between that and pushing them into the doors/gap, which results in them staring at me (or speak to me), I'll choose letting them push past me. I'm too lazy to rush for seats. I'm sure many of you should have seen people like that. It seems the seats are some sort of holy relic and when they sit down in them they can feel the presence of their gods.
I'm not talking about the really old ones. Those can't push anyway. WEAK!! But they're too old, so they have no choice. And most of the times I give them my seats, purely because I can see I'm the only one crazy enough to do so.
But it's a totally different matter when they demand seats from you while there are empty seats nearby. Once, some old geezer woke me up in the train and pointed at that damned sign. I looked around, stood up, and took the seat in front of me. IN FRONT OF ME!!! WTF MAN! If you're that old, stay home for fuck sakes!
It's precisely for these people that Soylent Green should exist. On one hand, we have old people here who are, sadly, seriously senile and cannot do anything on their own properly. On the other hand, we have starving people in Africa.
Since those old people are this senile, they probably won't know what happens if they die of carbon monoxide poisoning anyway. Or other "more orthodox" forms of euthanasia.
And since the starving people are hungry enough to eat anything, Soylent Green should be fine with them. Let us keep the flour and sugar. They can have the all-rounded food made of the most complex creatures in existence. Yea, see? They'd get the better side of the deal. While we keep only the carbohydrates and sugars, they get all the nutrients they will ever need. I just hope they remove the more disgusting bits first. Like the tumours.
And if they throw in all the bodies of people who have no kins and friends, the U.S should have an unlimited supply of Soylent Green right from the streets. And Iraq too, with that war killing the hundreds of thousands of people. Many of those probably died with their kins and friends anyway, so few living people will recognize them, let alone care about them.
This may seem heartless, but if you can only see for yourself what's happening out there, you will understand that this is not cruel at all.
Rocky mountain oysters... some sort of oyster found in the mountains(omfg)?
Spam is Spam. Everyone knows what Spam is(the pork stuff, not the important emails from your boss).
Soylent Green.. sounds like some sort of biscuit?
Spam is made most parts of the pig, only excluding the ears, scalps, snouts, mucous membranes, sinews, genital systems, udders, intestines and urinary bladder. Which leaves us the "really edible" stuff like the lungs, heart, brains(?) and etc. And ham. Never forget the ham, lest you totally lose the desire for Spam.
Historically, the only part that has never been used in this family of products, is the pigs' penises. Just a little trivia.
Rocky mountain oysters are balls. Bulls' balls. Never a cow's balls cos that'd be a tranny's balls. And that's just so wrong.
Cows. Trannies. Sodomised bulls. And the chain goes on and on.
And Soylent Green! My favourite! It's fictional, but it sure sounds so interesting! It's made of people. The euthanized ones. Though at times I can imagine some would wish otherwise.
Well, there were other Soylents but they were never as popular as the Green version.
But what's wrong with offal? In Singapore alone you can find pigs' offal sold everywhere. It's an important part of the Chinese cuisine. In Hong Kong you can find barbecued cows' offal in the streets too. And they don't taste half bad!
There are worse things than eating these, if you find them distasteful at all in the first place. In the Philippines eggs with half-grown chicks in them are sold in the streets, boiled. Those who like this describe it as a 3-course meal. I can't remember exactly what these 3 courses are exactly except there's the soup and there's the main course. Go figure.
Of course I am interested in what this taste like. It's not like it's still alive. If you find this cruel, just think about what they do in abortions and you'll find this more acceptable. Or fresh seafood, for that matter.
In case you don't know how some types of fresh seafood are cooked, they are thrown into boiling water alive. Not all, just some.
Like certain shellfishes. Imagine the agony it goes through, being in the boiling water and not able to struggle at all.
Insects! That's one distasteful subject if it's seen as food. It's high in protein, no doubt. Thanks but no thanks, but I'll get my proteins from milk.
After all these "gross" stuff, all these boiling/eating things alive discussions, I can tell you for sure that if you think on what you see in those animal documentaries on Discovery or National Geographic Channel, you'd see that many animals in the wild are eaten alive.
Yes, most of them would be dead when they get eaten, but not all hungry animals are patient creatures. Like piranhas. Piranhas are edible, though it must take some guts to do that sort of fishing. You don't truly know what's a "frenzy" till you see them feed.
And after eating piranhas, the natives would save their jaws as cutters which they use for haircuts. Serious. It works.
Or snakes! Yea, snakes eat many things while they're still alive. They paralyze their preys and swallow them whole, which means if the prey doesn't suffocate soon enough, the stomach acids will have to do the rest. Which means a slow and painful death.
But this cruelty doesn't compare to what humans do to their food. How do you think they get sharks' fins? They catch that shark, cut it's fins off and throw it back. Alive. Where it's blood will probably attract other fishes, not excluding fellow sharks. Sharks are known to eat anything, even car tires. Since fishes need their fins to swim properly, it will die.
It will know it's injured and cannot escape other predators. It can struggle but it cannot win. And the other fishes will tear it apart alive, just like the rest of the preys.
Stop eating sharks' fins, if you want to help the world.
Stick with birds' nest, since it only kills humans. The careless ones.
Abalone is a strange food. It is hard to understand why anyone would want to pay hundreds of dollars to eat a big piece of shellfish. The rare ones are expensive only because they are rare, not because they are especially tasty. The reason for anyone to eat these abalones can be anything except for its delicious taste.
Abalones are good if they're boiled in water properly. There's no need to add much, maybe just some oyster sauce. You want to taste the abalone, not the chicken.
In case you don't understand, many restaurants use chicken soup to boil the abalones. But why the heck would you want chicken soup that's been boiled for days to cook the abalone with? And cook for hours? Yea it's definitely the essence of the chicken there, good stuff, but I want to taste the abalone, not the chicken.
It's like eating sushi with a fuckload of wasabi. Or noodles with the whole damned jar of chilli. You are losing the point of eating what you are eating, focusing too much on enhancing its taste to finally appreciate the work of the chef. If I were the chef, I'd feel insulted if you add too much of these "taste-enhancers" into what I cooked. It will mean you find the food unsatisfactory.
I see it as a good idea if you can eat that first bite without adding anything, unless recommended by the chef. This will give you an idea of how good the work is. The salt and pepper are there to improve the taste, and you should not mistake them for the main course.
As always there are people who do that, adding a hell of a lot of stuff to what they eat, mainly because they're there. These people are living in the wrong era. They belong to the post-WWII days when ketchup was a luxury of the rich, and the poor eat bark. Seriously, if you take things only because they're there for the taking, you should go for the recycling industry.
Maybe that's one reason why I really don't like cheaper buffets that are not ala carte. Call me spoilt. Call me sissy. But I don't like to push people, physically or not. I tend to hurt them when I do. It's some sort of a packaged deal. Comes with the "being big".
Reminds me of those times when I have middle-aged people squeeze into queues with me. Like going up buses or trains. I tend to move slowly so that I don't push anyone. I let the ladies go first 'cause they're easier to push down( if need be LOL!). I have a rough idea of what my "slight push" means to other weaker people. Kinda.
A few them have even stared at me and pushed past me to go for the seats! Well, if I have to choose between that and pushing them into the doors/gap, which results in them staring at me (or speak to me), I'll choose letting them push past me. I'm too lazy to rush for seats. I'm sure many of you should have seen people like that. It seems the seats are some sort of holy relic and when they sit down in them they can feel the presence of their gods.
I'm not talking about the really old ones. Those can't push anyway. WEAK!! But they're too old, so they have no choice. And most of the times I give them my seats, purely because I can see I'm the only one crazy enough to do so.
But it's a totally different matter when they demand seats from you while there are empty seats nearby. Once, some old geezer woke me up in the train and pointed at that damned sign. I looked around, stood up, and took the seat in front of me. IN FRONT OF ME!!! WTF MAN! If you're that old, stay home for fuck sakes!
It's precisely for these people that Soylent Green should exist. On one hand, we have old people here who are, sadly, seriously senile and cannot do anything on their own properly. On the other hand, we have starving people in Africa.
Since those old people are this senile, they probably won't know what happens if they die of carbon monoxide poisoning anyway. Or other "more orthodox" forms of euthanasia.
And since the starving people are hungry enough to eat anything, Soylent Green should be fine with them. Let us keep the flour and sugar. They can have the all-rounded food made of the most complex creatures in existence. Yea, see? They'd get the better side of the deal. While we keep only the carbohydrates and sugars, they get all the nutrients they will ever need. I just hope they remove the more disgusting bits first. Like the tumours.
And if they throw in all the bodies of people who have no kins and friends, the U.S should have an unlimited supply of Soylent Green right from the streets. And Iraq too, with that war killing the hundreds of thousands of people. Many of those probably died with their kins and friends anyway, so few living people will recognize them, let alone care about them.
This may seem heartless, but if you can only see for yourself what's happening out there, you will understand that this is not cruel at all.
Sunday, 1 April 2007
Rant 044 / There's No "I' In "Teamwork", But There Sure Is "Laughter" In "Slaughter"!
A short introduction to Zombies
Zombies are a misunderstood people, and are shunned by the general public due to their unfriendly nature. They are really not harmful, and their life stories are generally very touching.
Zombies are largely emos, to such a degree that they are also anti-social. They are often abused by their parents during childhood, and bullied by the not-so-emo kids in school. Eventually, they grow up to distrust humanity as a whole and end up working as cashiers, security guards and bloggers.
Where to find them
With such distrust that zombies have for society, they can frequently be heard whining and complaining about everything in life. In their point of view, life is always unfair, and never in their favour. These whines and complaints can be heard or seen in online games, pubs, TV shows, and blogs, and can touch on everything from Chuck Norris to their ingrown toenails.
Another common sign of zombies is the way they do not care about everything. Or so they claim. "Everything" in this case consists of primarily of their outer appearance and the attempts of other people trying to initiate conversations with them. Shabby clothings in public, and ignoring greetings online are sure signs of zombies.
Other ways to identify a zombie include denials that they whine, and egocentric arguments, and blogs that criticize blogs that discuss people who blog about bloggers.
History of Zombies
Zombies were first discovered in Africa circa 400 BC, where they fed mainly on the spaghetti shoots that grow in the endless savanna of Eastern Africa. These zombies were slow, and unresponsive to foreigners, making them the perfect food for the cannibal tribes that migrated near their native lands.
By the 15th century, zombies were introduced to Europe when slavers found their taste preferable to the scurvy-infected slaves they were eating. They realized that zombies were easy to rear, and cost little to feed, as they were willing to feed on the dying slaves themselves, forming a small ecological food chain on the slaver ships.
Zombies were popular in 16th century Scotland as the main ingredient in Haggis. Wild zombies were caught by hunters by leaving sheeps in cages that snap shut once a zombie enters the cage to satisfy their sexual cravings. But by the 18th century, the Scots find sheep innards more savoury than zombie flesh, and zombies were replaced by sheep guts in haggis soon after.
In early 19th century, with the introduction of animal rights in Europe, Asia and the Americas due to radical animal activists, zombies became a source of food no longer. People were willing to take them in as pets, and became "part of the family" as in the cases of dogs and cats. But unlike other house pets, these zombies eventually evolved to understand and use rudimentary speech, and soon became "part of the society".
Modern zombies are still capable of several words and phrases at most, mainly lines like "FUCK!", "What the FUCK!" and "Why the FUCK!", if they speak at all.
Zombies are a misunderstood people, and are shunned by the general public due to their unfriendly nature. They are really not harmful, and their life stories are generally very touching.
Zombies are largely emos, to such a degree that they are also anti-social. They are often abused by their parents during childhood, and bullied by the not-so-emo kids in school. Eventually, they grow up to distrust humanity as a whole and end up working as cashiers, security guards and bloggers.
Where to find them
With such distrust that zombies have for society, they can frequently be heard whining and complaining about everything in life. In their point of view, life is always unfair, and never in their favour. These whines and complaints can be heard or seen in online games, pubs, TV shows, and blogs, and can touch on everything from Chuck Norris to their ingrown toenails.
Another common sign of zombies is the way they do not care about everything. Or so they claim. "Everything" in this case consists of primarily of their outer appearance and the attempts of other people trying to initiate conversations with them. Shabby clothings in public, and ignoring greetings online are sure signs of zombies.
Other ways to identify a zombie include denials that they whine, and egocentric arguments, and blogs that criticize blogs that discuss people who blog about bloggers.
History of Zombies
Zombies were first discovered in Africa circa 400 BC, where they fed mainly on the spaghetti shoots that grow in the endless savanna of Eastern Africa. These zombies were slow, and unresponsive to foreigners, making them the perfect food for the cannibal tribes that migrated near their native lands.
By the 15th century, zombies were introduced to Europe when slavers found their taste preferable to the scurvy-infected slaves they were eating. They realized that zombies were easy to rear, and cost little to feed, as they were willing to feed on the dying slaves themselves, forming a small ecological food chain on the slaver ships.
Zombies were popular in 16th century Scotland as the main ingredient in Haggis. Wild zombies were caught by hunters by leaving sheeps in cages that snap shut once a zombie enters the cage to satisfy their sexual cravings. But by the 18th century, the Scots find sheep innards more savoury than zombie flesh, and zombies were replaced by sheep guts in haggis soon after.
In early 19th century, with the introduction of animal rights in Europe, Asia and the Americas due to radical animal activists, zombies became a source of food no longer. People were willing to take them in as pets, and became "part of the family" as in the cases of dogs and cats. But unlike other house pets, these zombies eventually evolved to understand and use rudimentary speech, and soon became "part of the society".
Modern zombies are still capable of several words and phrases at most, mainly lines like "FUCK!", "What the FUCK!" and "Why the FUCK!", if they speak at all.
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